


Phantoms And Shadows

by DeadMilitia



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Fear, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Paranoia, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Run Away, Self-Harm, selectively mute at first
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-17
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-05-27 06:12:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 31,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6272974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeadMilitia/pseuds/DeadMilitia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes life doesn't work out the way you thought. Sometimes you end up being a run away living in a barn with a cat. Or you end up getting fired from your job as a comic artist and feeling like a failure. Sometimes you move to the country to try to gain new inspiration. Sometimes you find that inspiration cowering in the corner of a barn. </p>
<p>Then sometimes you end up falling in love with an abused sixteen year old you found in a barn. Life is crazy, sometimes in a good way, sometimes not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first attempt at Frerard.... Hopefully it doesn't suck. I would really appreciate if you guys let me know if you want me to keep going. I promise it will be better than it seems right now. First chapters are hard on me... So are summaries. Also, I normally don't write in third person and the chapters will get longer. 
> 
> I got the idea for this story while taking pictures of the mostly abandoned farm near me, combined with a local ghost story of an old barn out in the middle of nowhere. While I was on the farm, it sounded like something walking around in the barn and this story came from that.   
> Story title from "Phantoms And Shadows" by Memory of a Melody.

Gerard made the long walk to his neighbor's property. He had finally gotten permission to take pictures on the mostly abandoned farm which was exciting to him. He had looked at the farm down the hill from his own home every day for the past year, but never had the chance to walk around it and take in all of it's old glory. Nobody had lived in the three story farm house in years and the most upkeep the property got was the yard mowed. The two barns were damaged, one practically on the ground already, and the house had some damage to the porch.

After crossing the two corn fields and creek that separated his house from the old farm, Gerard finally stepped on to the property for the first time. There was a weird sense of accomplishment, finally getting to explore the farm with complete freedom. He even had permission to go inside both barns, something he hadn't expected Chris to agree to.

He lifted his camera that hung around his neck and began taking a few pictures of whatever caught his attention. Even though they mowed the yard, it wasn't in the best condition. Mole hills wrecked the yard and there were briars and brush engulfing the wooden fence lining the field. Gerard decided to start on one end of the property and work his way through, taking the time to see everything.

He decided to wait to go inside the barn, spending more time taking pictures of the outside and then moving to the other one. He peeked inside the oldest barn and found the roof sinking in. It had already fallen down on one side. Since he was the only person there and nobody else knew he was on the property today, he decided to be safe and not chance it. Not this time anyway. He turned back to the tall, two story barn and pulled open one of the large doors. Chills ran through his body as he glanced around, finally daring to step inside.

There were rumors surrounding the old farm of the barn being haunted. All of which Gerard had heard from the old men who gathered every morning to have coffee at the diner he worked at. They told him about the old couple who had lived here. The woman died of natural causes in one of the upstairs bedrooms, leaving her husband at the secluded farm alone. The story is that he was found hanging from the rafters in the barn presumably a week after he had died. Nobody knew he had killed himself because the couple kept to themselves. They had no family in the area and hardly talked to people in town. His self seclusion got worse after losing his wife, so not seeing him for a week wasn't seen as odd. Then some teens looking for work went to offer him a hand on the farm. They found the barn door open and assumed he was inside. They were correct.

Gerard felt like he was being watched, causing his heart to speed up. He tried to brush it off, telling himself that it was just the story getting to him. He tried to push the story to the back of his mind, but his head kept snapping up with every little creak. He had to admit, capturing a picture of a ghost would be awesome. He froze when he heard what sounded like someone walking above him. Maybe it was an animal of some kind?

He was compelled to make his way up the wooden ladder in the corner of the room after hearing the footsteps again. Putting the strap of the camera around his neck, he began climbing the ladder. He stopped to poke his head through the hole at the top to glance around. There were no animals he could see and the noise had stopped. There were walls dividing the top room, some with latch doors on them. He climbed the rest of the way on to the floor and got up.

He began snapping pictures, walking around the barn and opening some of the doors. Most were empty and some had farming equipment in them. He looked around again, still feeling like he was being watched. He opened another of the latches and pulled the door open. Something darted out of the small room, making Gerard's heart stop.

"Jesus Christ! Fucking cat!" He yelled, glancing over at the orange cat sitting on the other side of the barn from him. He stepped into the room, pulling his eyebrows together at what was inside. There were two plastic bowls sitting on the floor. One had food scraps in it and the other had water. Who would be feeding that cat up here? He glanced back at the cat who was cleaning itself.

"I suppose the ghost is feeding you?" Gerard smirked, the cat paying him no attention. It suddenly sat up and looked toward the hay bales in the back of the room. The cat strutted over and behind the hay bales. Gerard went back to what he was doing. At least the cat gave him some company. He ignored any other noises, knowing it was just the cat. He continued through the barn, taking pictures of whatever looked cool.

When he got to the back of the barn he noticed another room hidden behind the hay bales. That must have been where the cat went. He walked towards it, hoping to maybe snap a few pictures of the barn cat. He pushed the door open the rest of the way, peering inside. He didn't see the cat but there was a lot of junk stuck in the room it could hide behind. He made his way through the junk, having to climb over some stuff to get to the back. After climbing over a stack of wood planks and jumping down, he let out a curse when he saw someone curled up in the corner.

"Fuck! What the hell?" He yelled, realizing it was a real human and not some apparition.

"I'm sorry," the person whimpered. He had his face turned toward the wall and the cat securely in his arms.

"What the hell are you doing up here? I thought this place was abandoned?"

"I-I take care of O'Malley," he replied quietly, sounding like he might cry.

"O'Malley? Like O'Malley The Alley Cat?" Gerard smirked. The guy finally dared to look at Gerard, the boy was cute but definitely young. Gerard noticed the boy had a large scar across his left cheek.

"I-I'll leave. I was just feeding him," the boy said with fearful eyes. Gerard shook his head.

"You were here first." Gerard pointed out. "I'll be heading out here soon anyway. I live up the hill," he pointed in the direction of his house. The boy only nodded. They both stayed silent for an awkward few minutes before Gerard spoke up again.

"Okay, well, I'll leave you two alone." He then left the room, heading back to the ladder. He walked around the lower half of the barn some more, snapping a few more pictures before leaving. He took some more of the outside and the house before making the long walk back to his own house. He glanced back at the barn several times. There was something about that kid. It looked like he hadn't bathed in weeks, his eyes were puffy and red like he hadn't slept in a while, and he looked terrified. It was like he expected Gerard to hurt him.

Once Gerard got back to his house, he went straight to his art room and opened his laptop. He plugged his camera into it and started transferring the pictures. He kept thinking of that kid while editing the pictures.

_No, Gerard, forget the kid. He's just a freak taking care of a barn cat._ He thought to himself, returning to his work. It wasn't doing much to take his mind off of the boy though. He couldn't wrap his mind around why the boy would be out in the middle of nowhere to take care of a cat. It had been a year now that Gerard lived in the area and he had never seen the dark haired boy before. It wasn't a big area, so he figured he was bound to have seen him in passing.

Gerard gave up on the editing, he could always finish it later. He got up from the desk chair and went to the black leather couch against the wall. He grabbed his sketch book and a charcoal pencil. He stared at the comic he had been working on before deciding to start a new picture. He flipped to a new page and began drawing. He ended up drawing the boy in the barn. He didn't remember all the details of his face, so he drew him cowering in the corner, hiding his face from the world.

\-------------------------

"Gerard, you're up," Ray called over the wall that separated the kitchen from the dining area. Gerard finished filling the coffee cups of customers before hurrying back to the kitchen. He placed the coffee pot back where it belonged before grabbing the three plates, balancing one on his forearm. He went out to the table and placed the food in front of the customers.

"Can I get you anything else?" He asked kindly. They all said no and thanked him before he walked away. He looked over when the door bell rang. "Hey Chris," he greeted. He grabbed a glass of sweet tea and a menu before heading to Chris's table. He was sure Chris would order the same thing he always did, but he still liked to look over the menu.

"Did you get down there to the farm?"

"Yeah, I did, thanks again," Gerard smiled. "Hey, um, do other people go down there often?"

"They're not supposed to be. Why? Did you see someone?" Chris asked. "I want what I usually get." He told Gerard, closing the menu. 

"Okay," Gerard answered, writing down the deluxe burger and fries that Chris always got. "No, I didn't see anyone, I just... heard something in the barn." Gerard lied, not wanting to get the kid in trouble. Chris began laughing.

"It was probably that ghost that hangs around down there." Gerard laughed a little, too.

"Yeah, probably," he replied with a small laugh. Gerard made his way into the kitchen to pin up Chris's order so Ray could start cooking it. "Ray, do you know of any dark haired teens in the area?" Ray gave him a weird look.

"Um, a couple, why?" He was staring at Gerard suspiciously.

"You can't tell anyone, but-" Ray cut him off.

"Please tell me you're not some pedophile who keeps dark haired teens locked in their basement." Ray sounded serious rather than joking. Gerard chuckled a little.

"That's not why I was asking. But I'm being serious, what I'm about to tell you, you can't tell anyone else. Okay?" Ray nodded his head, intrigued by what his friend had to tell him. "I went down to that farm over the hill from me and there was a teen upstairs in the barn. He looked like he hadn't showered or eaten in a while. He claimed he was just feeding a cat up there, but I don't know." 

"Think he's a run away? Some times they live in abandoned buildings." Ray pointed out.

"Could be," Gerard said. "Should I report it? I mean, what do you do with a run away? Obviously run aways have a reason to run away." Gerard pointed out, watching Ray move around the kitchen.

"You can report it, but if he had a real reason to run away, he'll just do it again. Maybe you should try talking to him? If he's still at the barn, I mean." Ray said as he began making out the plate.

"And say what? That I think it's odd that he's taking care of a stray in a barn? Ask why he ran away from home? Offer to call the police so he can go home to whatever he's running from?" Ray sighed and shook his head.

"No, I don't know," it was quiet between the two as Ray finished up Chris's order. "Maybe it's best if you just forget you ever saw him."

"Yeah, maybe," Gerard replied before taking the plate out to Chris. Maybe he should just forget the kid.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really shouldn't have started this story because it's the only one I want to work on now. I wrote three chapters in one night. I'll save the next chapter for later, mostly because I can't proofread it right now. 
> 
> Also, Gerard is 24 in this story and Frank is sixteen.

Frank could feel his heart pounding in his chest. He had to be careful not to get caught. He hadn't really eaten much himself, but he swiped scraps tossed out by people in the area to feed O'Malley. People don't like you snooping around their property in the middle of the night though. He had to be aware of what houses had dogs that would alert their owners of his presence.

Now he had to be extra careful. The closest house to the barn belonged to the man who caught him a week ago. The man tossed his scraps out at the edge of the woods though. It wasn't the safest thing since it attracts all kinds of animals to your property, but Frank was happy the man didn't care. Frank had even stolen water from the man's water hose a few times while the man was gone. He felt bad for stealing from the red haired man, but he had to do it to survive. It wasn't like he was stealing anything the man would miss. It was just a milk jug of water once a week.

Frank used a stick to dig through the food the red haired man had thrown out. He found some scraps of meat and placed them in the plastic bowl. After he decided there was nothing else worth giving O'Malley, he started back towards the barn. He hated the dark and having to walk through two, pitch black corn fields wasn't ideal for him. Neither was living in a dark, abandoned barn, but he didn't have a choice. He wasn't going back to his uncle's.

\---------------------------

Gerard got up from his art desk, leaning over to shut off the lights on either side of the window. After clicking off the second light, something caught his attention outside. The light on shed gave a small glow over the back yard, illuminating something digging through the food scraps he'd thrown out earlier. He figured it was just an animal. A large animal. Maybe he should have listened to the warnings about tossing out his food scraps. Then the figure stood up on two legs and quickly made a run for the field, passing close enough to the shed light that Gerard could see it was a human.

 _What the fuck?_ He thought, furrowing his eyebrows. Why would someone being digging through his food scraps? He shook his head before leaving the art room, shutting the door behind him. He went downstairs and placed his coffee cup in the sink before pouring out the rest of of the pot and rinsing it. He made his way upstairs to take a quick shower and get ready for bed.

After Gerard was laying in bed, he couldn't fall asleep. He laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. He thought moving to the country would help clear his mind, maybe help him get his job back. But none of his ideas were new or good. They were still lame and over-done. Drawing had always been his passion. It used to come so easy. But drawing for a paycheck made it difficult. Maybe because he had been restricted at his old job; forced to work within the lines his boss drew.

Lately though, he had been drawing that timid boy from the barn. His latest drawing was of the boy cowering against a wall with shadows of demons surrounding him. There was a story to the boy. One Gerard desperately wanted to know. He tried to forget him. He really did. He tried to draw something else, tried to think of other things when looking at the barn pictures, tried to forget the terrified look the teen had given him. He really tried to forget him.

After two hours of staring at the dark ceiling, Gerard had come up with a plan. He would go back to the farm to take more pictures and see if the boy was there. Maybe he was just a painfully shy kid taking care of a stray cat. Maybe his parents wouldn't let him have pets and he stumbled across O'Malley. Maybe he was just small teen who had poor personal hygiene.

\-------------------------

As soon as Gerard got off work the next day, he quickly changed his clothes and grabbed his camera. He locked his front door and started towards the old farm. His heart was hammering in his chest and he wasn't sure why. Probably because he had no clue what he was going to do if the teen was in the barn. What if he really is a run away? What if Gerard showing up again would frighten him and make him leave? Gerard didn't want to scare the kid away if he really was seeking shelter.

After stepping on to the property, he paused to look around and listen. It was as quiet as the first time he had been here. He made a B-line for the barn, pulling open the large door, causing it to creak. He looked around but saw no sign of the boy or the cat. After clearing the bottom half of the barn, he climbed the ladder. He peeked through the hole in the floor, nothing. He climbed the rest of the way on to the floor and made his way through the top half. He opened every door, just to be sure. There was no cowering teen or running cat in any of them.

He finally slipped behind the hay bales to the hidden room. He stopped to listen but heard nothing. He began climbing over the stuff, finally climbing on top of the wood planks. He peeked over the other side, seeing what he hoped to see. The teen was curled up on the floor, covered up with an old, ratty, white blanket. The cat was curled up at his side and was the only one of the two to look up at him.

Gerard moved to sit on the edge of the wood pile. The cat watched him and finally meowed at him, standing up to stretch. Gerard flinched when the cat's meowing caused the boy to stir. His eyes opened briefly to locate the cat before shutting again. His hand came up to pet the cat in a soothing way, mumbling something Gerard couldn't understand. O'Malley meowed again, moving towards Gerard. He climbed up on to the planks with Gerard, rubbing against him. Gerard reached out to run his hand across the cat's orange fur.

Gerard felt like a stalker. He had just been sitting and watching the boy sleep. O'Malley had decided to sit near Gerard to clean himself. Any time the teen would stir or make a noise, the cat would stop what it was doing to look over at him. Gerard had never really liked cats. He always saw them as assholes, but this cat obviously cared for the teen. As much as a cat could care, anyway.

Gerard decided to try sneaking back out of the barn. He wasn't sure what he was going to do if the boy woke up and found him watching him sleep. It was definitely creepy as hell. Just as he moved to climb down the other side of the planks, O'Malley jumped down, causing a loud noise in the dead silent barn. Gerard winced and froze, hoping the boy would stay sleeping. He stared down as the teen moved around. He rubbed his hands over his eyes before fully opening them.

Gerard stayed frozen, heart pounding in his chest. Frank's eyes finally landed on Gerard, causing him to let out a small scream and scramble to get away. He curled up in the corner and appeared to be shaking.

"Hey, don't be afraid of me. I won't hurt you," Gerard gently assured the teen. He carefully climbed down and walked over to the teen. He sat cross-legged on the floor, leaving some room between him and the scared boy. "My name's Gerard." Gerard reached out to pet O'Malley who walked past him and over to the boy who opened his arms to embrace the cat when it jumped on him. Gerard really wished the boy would look over at him, but figured he wasn't going to be that lucky.

"What's your name?" The boy shook his head no. "Oh, come on, I told you mine," Gerard said, smiling a little.

"F-Frank," the boy said, barely audible.

"Frank?" Gerard asked to clarify he had heard right. Frank nodded in confirmation. "So, I take it there's more to you being here than just feeding O'Malley." It was quiet for a while, Frank still with his back to Gerard and shaking. Gerard wanted to reach out and rub the boy's back, to offer him some sort of comfort, but knew that his touch would just frighten Frank more.

"It seems like O'Malley really loves you." Gerard thought that maybe talking normally to Frank would help calm him down. Maybe make himself seem less intimidating. "How old are you?" Gerard waited for a while but never got a reply.

"Okay, so talking isn't your thing, that's cool." Gerard started to feel awkward just sitting there and it was obvious Frank wasn't enjoying his company. "Okay, well, I guess I'll leave." Gerard said slowly. He waited another moment to see if he got any reaction from Frank. After realizing the teen wasn't going to move from his hiding spot, Gerard stood up and quietly left the room.

\------------------------

Gerard had spent the rest of his day texting Ray and Mikey about the boy in the barn. He asked them their opinions and advice on what to do. Neither one of them were much help though. Gerard sat at his desk and stared out the window. It was fall and while the days were nice, the nights were cold. He couldn't stop thinking of Frank alone in that barn in the dark and probably freezing every night.

Gerard got up from the desk and made his way downstairs. He opened the closet in the living room and grabbed a pillow and the warmest blanket he could find before heading to his car. He placed the pillow and blanket in his backseat before getting in. He drove to the restaurant he worked at to get some food. He ordered a burger, fries, and cheese and broccoli soup. After getting the food, he placed them in the back seat also. He the went to the small general store across the road and got a bottle of Pepsi and two jugs of water.

Gerard drove down the gravel driveway and across the old, wooden bridge over the creek that led to the farm. He parked and got out, grabbing the blanket and pillow before heading inside the barn. He managed to carry them up the ladder with difficulty. He placed them on the floor before going back for the food and drinks. He wasn't sure how to get them up the ladder. He looked around for something he could use. He finally found a basket that would work well enough. He placed the food and the Pepsi in the basket first, putting the handle on his arm and climbing up before going back for the water jugs.

He decided the food and Pepsi were the most important at the moment. He picked them up and headed to the hidden room. After getting over everything, he peeked down to see Frank sitting on the floor crying.

"Hey," he said quietly, trying not to startle Frank. It didn't work though. Frank gasped and scrambled away, backing himself into his corner. He was still facing Gerard, but had his knees to his chest and his arms tightly around them. "I'm not going to hurt you. I brought you food," Gerard announced, holding up the styrofoam container and plastic bowl. He placed them back in the basket before climbing down. He set the basket in front of Frank who stared at it before glancing up at Gerard.

"I also brought some other stuff," Gerard said, slowly moving away from Frank. He retrieved the rest of the stuff and brought it to Frank's hiding spot. He was happy to see Frank opening the lid on the plastic bowl. "I wasn't sure what you'd like." Frank just stared at him before looking at the styrofoam container. He set his soup down and opened the container.

"Oh, I guess I forgot to get you a spoon." Gerard said, feeling bad he had forgotten. Frank shook his head no in an attempt to tell Gerard it was okay. After realizing Frank wasn't going to eat in front of him, Gerard stood up again. "Okay, well, I'll let you eat. Um, I brought you a pillow and blanket so hopefully you'll be a little warmer. Um, if you ever need anything, I'm just up the hill." Gerard offered him a kind smile to which he got no reaction. Frank continued to stare at him. Gerard gave him an awkward wave before turning to leave, picking up the basket to put at the bottom of the ladder.

"Th-Thank you," he heard Frank whisper. Had he been any farther away, he wouldn't have heard the words. He turned and gave Frank another smile.

"You're welcome," he said before leaving.

\-------------------------------

Frank pulled the hamburger off of the bun and gave it to O'Malley when he came back from wherever he had been. O'Malley happily accepted the food. Frank put all of the vegetables back on the top half of the bun and began eating it. The bottom bun was greasy and gross. He didn't eat meat, but he didn't want to complain. It was nice of Gerard to get him anything at all.

He poured some of the cheese out of his soup into the lid of the stryfoam container and offered it to O'Malley who happily lapped at the cheese. He lifted the bowl to his lips and ate some of the soup. He drank the remaining liquid out of the bowl before using his fingers to eat the larger pieces of broccoli. O'Malley didn't care much for the french fry Frank offered him and instead began cleaning his face off while Frank ate the fries. It was the most food Frank had had in a long time.

Once it began getting dark, he laid the old blanket he had found in the barn down on the floor. He put the pillow at one end and spread out the new blanket. The pillow just had a plain white cover on it and the blanket was a plain, maroon color. The pillow was more comfortable than laying his head on the hard floor and the blanket was thick and warm.

Even though he was more comfortable and warm, he still didn't fall asleep. It was hard to sleep when you were alone in a dark barn that creaked and popped. He normally slept during the day when he felt safer. Even then he didn't get much sleep. He snuggled the blanket a little tighter around him. At least now he didn't have to be cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how do you all feel about this story? Is it good? Is it bad? Should I delete it and we all pretend it never happened?   
> Also, writing about a barn makes me think of the Easter Barney movie. Like images of Barney dancing around and singing in a barn keep popping up.... I think I need sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ended up re-writing this chapter a little, which is why it took longer to get posted than I thought it would. Plus life hasn't been treating me great lately, so I haven't had much motivation to do much. But my favorite customer came in to the restaurant last night and made me feel better. He hung around while we cleaned up, told us stories of his world travels, and sang opera for us.

"Hey, will you make me something to take home?" Gerard asked, leaning against the counter in the kitchen.

"Sure, what do you want?" Ray asked, continuing to clean up the line a little.

"Um, how about a chicken sandwich?"

"You got it," Ray said, going to the next room from the kitchen to get a piece of chicken. Gerard grabbed a small to-go box and began making a salad. He wasn't sure what type of dressing Frank liked, so he grabbed Italian and stuck it in the container with the salad.

"Can I get a bowl of that soup, too?" Gerard asked, motioning to the large pot of vegetable soup.

"Yeah," Ray said, flipping the chicken on the grill. "You want everything on this?"

"Yeah, and fries, please," Gerard said. Ray nodded and put some fries in the fryer before making up the bun in a styrofoam container. Gerard went back out to check on his last tables and clean up one of them. He looked back at the clock on the wall, Bob was late, again. Gerard just hoped he wouldn't be too much longer. After putting all of the dishes in the sink, he began washing them. He put the dishwasher tray through and walked back over to look at the clock again. Bob was twenty minutes late. He glanced at the containers on the counter and back at the clock. He didn't want the food to be cold by the time he got it to Frank.

"Sorry I'm late," Bob apologized, tying his black apron on.

"It's fine, I gotta go," Gerard answered. "See ya later, Ray," he called as he grabbed the bag with the food in it. He didn't bother going home to clean up, he just drove down the long driveway. He parked and got out, carrying the bag of food with him. Once he got to Frank's hiding spot, he was a little disappointed to find Frank wasn't there. He decided to sit and wait, maybe Frank would be coming back soon.

\------------------------

Frank wandered around the small town, trying to remain unnoticed. Of course people who walked past would give him looks. He was dirty, gross, and probably smelled. Even when he lived with his uncle he barely got to shower. That was one of the reasons he got bullied at school, his poor hygiene. It wasn't his fault though and he always thought it was unfair. He had gotten enough abuse at home, did he really deserve it at school, too? His uncle sure made him feel like he deserved everything he got.

He rounded back towards the barn. He only walked around because he got so stir crazy sitting in the barn all day and night. This was the first time he dared to walk out in public though. Normally he just walked around the woods near the farm, never venturing too far away so he wouldn't get lost. He hadn't been brave enough to go out in public, afraid of what people would do or say to him. He hadn't expected the looks to hurt so much.

His heart began pounding when he saw the car in the driveway. He was terrified of being caught. What if it was the property owners? He had managed to avoid them every time they were around by quietly hiding in the barn. They never came inside, they only mowed the yard then left. He quickly and quietly ran to the barn. He didn't see anyone. He went to the back of the barn where some of the boards were broken, creating a big enough hole in the wall for him to slip inside. He looked around, thankful he didn't see anyone. He snuck to the ladder and quietly went up. He quietly snuck to his hiding room.

After weaseling his way through all of the junk in the room, he finally got to his corner. He let out a surprised scream when he saw the red haired man sitting on the floor.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." Gerard looked guilty. "I brought you some food, which is probably cold by now." Frank tried to smile but the most he could do was make the corner of his lip twitch.

"Um, how about you come back up to the house with me and I can heat this up?" Gerard offered, causing Frank's eyes to go wide. He shook his head no, making Gerard feel bad. Of course Frank wouldn't trust him that easily.

"I promise I won't hurt you. Come on, O'Malley can come to," Gerard offered, glancing at the cat curled up on the pillow. Frank stared at O'Malley for a minute before looking back at Gerard then to the floor.

"O'Malley?" He asked quietly.

"Yeah, O'Malley's welcome to come along." Gerard said softly. Frank bit his lip and looked back at the cat again before shaking his head no. Gerard sighed before nodding. "Okay, I'll be back in a few minutes... Will you still be here?" Frank nodded, still not looking up at Gerard.

After Gerard was gone, Frank sat on his make-shift bed and began petting O'Malley. Why was Gerard being so nice to him? It didn't take a genius to figure out what the man wanted. He wanted Frank. Tears began burning his eyes and he laid down to bury his face in O'Malley's side. The cat's purring offered some comfort for Frank. His uncle had been right. He was only good for one thing. Even this strange man had decided he wanted Frank and there was no way he would be able to keep it from happening. For all he knows, Gerard could come back and demand payment for the food and bedding he had offered Frank. He would have no choice but to submit to the man. Nobody was going to care if a run away got raped.

When Gerard returned, he found Frank laying on the floor crying. He walked over and sat on the floor beside Frank, looking down at him with sympathy.

"Here, sit up and eat," Gerard told him gently. Frank obeyed though he didn't seem to be in the mood to eat. Gerard sat there while Frank picked at his food. Frank kept glancing up at Gerard. "Why were you crying?" Gerard asked softly. Frank just stared down at the food in front of him.

"You know, you really are welcome at my house, both of you are." Gerard, said looking over at O'Malley who kept reaching his paw over to try to steal the chicken sandwich. Frank glanced up at Gerard again before reaching down to remove the chicken from the sandwich and give it to O'Malley. He then put the vegetables back on the top half of the bun before eating it. Gerard pulled his eyebrows together. He brushed it off though, figuring that Frank just wanted to be sure O'Malley ate, too.

\---------------------------

Later that night, Gerard couldn't help but feel bad that Frank was all alone in that barn. He knew there was nothing he could about it though. Frank didn't even trust him enough to come to the house to eat. He would never go for sleeping here, even just for a night.

He finally gave up on sleep and went down the hall to his art room. He sat down at the desk and tried to work on his current comic some more. He wasn't really getting anywhere with it. He wasn't even sure what the plot was anymore. He sighed and put down his pencil, resting his elbows on the desk and his head in his hands. It was no wonder he had been fired. He was terrible at this. He wasn't sure what had changed. When he was in high school, he drew little comics a lot, he did great in art school, and those comics were what got him his job.

The four years he spent at school made him feel as if he really had potential. Then the one year he spent working made him feel worn out. The first six months of his job he had been so excited and passionate, then it changed. He became so run down and began struggling to finish his work. Maybe it was because it wasn't his comic. Someone else wrote the story, he read it, then drew the scenes. It wasn't personal and he had very little say in any of it. He had thought when he started the job, he would have freedom over the drawings, but he didn't. The comics had to be approved and were often sent back with what they wanted changed.

Gerard flipped the page and began on a new comic. This one was about a ghost kid who was tortured by demons. Nobody could see him therefore nobody knew he was suffering. Gerard couldn't believe how easy this comic was to do. He switched between drawing out the scenes and writing down the story in a separate book.

\------------------------------

_"You fucking, ungrateful brat!" Another smack. Frank sat in the corner of the living room crying and trying to cover his face. He would cry out that he was sorry every time his uncle hit or kicked him. He hadn't meant to make him so mad. "I fucking took you in and you repay me by bitching at me?" Another punch._

_"I'm sorry!" Frank screamed, letting out another sob. All he did was tell his uncle he was a vegetarian. He didn't know what he had done wrong._

_"Go to your room!" Another kick to Frank's leg. Frank scrambled to get up and ran up the stairs. He didn't go to his room though, he ran straight to the bathroom and began throwing up. He was terrified and confused. Was it really that wrong to be a vegetarian? His mom had never had a problem with it._

_After he was finished emptying his stomach, he cracked the door open to make sure his uncle wasn't waiting for him. He then limped to his bedroom and crawled under his blankets. He began sobbing so hard he gagged._

Frank reached up to wipe the tears away. Finally breaking himself from his memories. That had been the first time his uncle hurt him and it only got worse from there. He didn't know why his uncle hated him so much. He didn't think he had done anything wrong. He never did. He basically walked on eggshells when he was home and he still got hurt.

Frank stood up and went to the wooden chest mixed in with all the other junk. He unlatched the lid and lifted it up. It had all of his belongings he managed to get away with. He had just shoved the things that were most important into a duffel bag when his uncle was at work and then ran. He pulled out the small photo album and sat with his back against the wall. He began flipping through the pictures of him and his mother.

He really missed her. She had been the only person who cared about him. His dad left when he was a kid. He wasn't close to any of his other family members. He didn't have friends. Nobody at school cared where the bruises and cuts had come from. Most just added to them. His teachers looked away when he came in with a black eye. His uncle beat and raped him, saying he wasn't worth anything else. And he started to believe it. Which is why he started inflicting pain on himself. If everyone else believed he deserved it than he must.

Frank closed the album and put it back before digging around some more. He found the folded up rag and unwrapped the razor hidden inside. He moved to take his shirt off, looking down at the scars and cuts that covered his body. He brought his hand down and pressed the razor into his stomach before dragging it across, gasping at the pain. The blade was old and kind dull, but it worked well enough. Sure it hurt, but he deserved it. He made several more cuts before sitting there and watching the blood. He used the rag the razor had been in to clean up the blood. He would have to wash the rag out later.

He was positive this Gerard person was just wanting to hurt him. He knew it was going to happen sooner or later. That's the reason the man wanted him to come to his house. That was the only reason Frank saw for the man's kindness. Nobody was kind to him without wanting something in return. Maybe it would be easier to just give in to the man and get it over with.

\---------------------------

Frank ended up crying himself to sleep. He woke up in a bit of a panic because of some loud noise. He whimpered in fear because it was so dark. After realizing he was safely in the barn with O'Malley at his side, he relaxed a little. It was unusually dark though. He noticed there was no moonlight coming through the small window. He hated cloudy nights, it made the dark and cold more harsh.

He let out a small scream when lightening flashed brightly outside. The thunder that followed made a loud cracking noise that shook the barn. Frank's hands shot up to cover his ears. He let out another whimper as the lightening and thunder shook the barn again. He kept his hands tightly over his ears and his eyes squeezed shut as tears escaped them. He hated loud or strange noises. They made his heart race and his stomach hurt.

O'Malley curled up in the teen's lap, purring softly. Frank wished the cat could offer him some comfort, but he didn't. Nothing made these moments better. It was times like this that he wished his mom was still alive. She would always let him sleep in her bed when it stormed. She would assure him over and over that he was safe. He was always scared, but he also felt safe with her. Now he's alone with a cat who can't tell him that everything will be okay. O'Malley can't assure him over and over that he's safe, he can't hug him and tell him the storm will pass soon.

Frank sat there sobbing, pressing his hands so tightly to his ears that it hurt. He felt like he was going to be sick, but couldn't bring himself to move in case he did throw up. He gagged a couple of times and was happy he didn't puke on himself and O'Malley.

As the storm got worse with the wind blowing violently and the lightening and thunder coming more frequently, Frank wished he wasn't there. He wish he had been strong enough to end his life the day he ran away. That was his original plan. He really tried, he was going to use his uncle's gun to do it. But he ended up packing a bag and running away. He was only a two hour drive from his uncle's house. He knew that because his uncle had friends in this area. Frank had been trying to get away and ended up bunkering down in the barn when it started raining. Then he found O'Malley and just never moved on from this place. That was one reason he hardly left the barn. If his uncle found him, he would kill him. He wasn't sure if his uncle reported him missing, but he was sure his friends know Frank ran away.

"O'Malley," he whimpered, forcing his eyes open and looking down at the cat. "I'm scared." He let another sob. He just wanted his mom. He wanted her to hug him and tell him everything would be okay.

\----------------------------

Gerard continued working on his comic, occasionally looking up at the window to watch the storm outside. It was raining so hard they could be having a hurricane. The wind was strong and the lightening and thunder were crazy. He kept thinking about Frank. He was sure the barn probably leaks and the cold wind gets inside easily. He rubbed a hand over his face. He couldn't just leave Frank down there all alone.

He got up and put his shoes on. He was still in black and red plaid pj pants and a black t-shirt, but he didn't care. He grabbed a hoodie and pulled it on before grabbing another hoodie, it was just a plain black hoodie, but it was warm. He grabbed another blanket out of the downstairs closet before stuffing the items into a trash bag to keep them from getting soaked. He put the trash bag in the passenger seat of his car and started it. He was kind of glad he didn't have close neighbors because shoving a trash bag in your car and driving away at midnight would probably look suspicious.

Once he got to the farm, he parked, grabbed the bag and ran to the barn, latching the door from the inside.

"Frank?" He called, hoping not to startle the boy. It was dark and he would probably give Frank a heart attack if he just showed up in front of him. He used the little key chain light he had to find his way through the barn. It was loud inside due to the wind. He wondered if Frank had even heard him? It was difficult to climb the ladder and hold the bag, but he managed. He made his way to the back room, shining the light around to let Frank know he was there. "Frank?" He called again before going into the room. He made his way to the back corner. He found Frank in the corner with his eyes squeezed shut and his hands over his ears.

He climbed down, not sure how to get Frank's attention without scaring him. He pulled open the trash bag and took out the blanket. He walked over to put it over Frank, but the boy's eyes opened before he could. Frank screamed and began freaking out. Begging to be left alone and apologizing over and over.

"Frank! Frank, stop! It's me, it's Gerard. It's okay, you're safe." Frank stopped his screaming and looked up at the dark figure in front of him.

"G-Gerard?" He asked in a small voice.

"Yeah, it's just me. You're safe," Gerard reassured him. "I brought you an extra blanket and a hoodie to keep you warm." He used the key chain light to show Frank what he brought. Frank stared up at Gerard. He was too scared to be alone again, but he didn't want to be hurt either.

"Are you okay?" Gerard asked, sitting down on the floor so he wasn't as intimidating.

"St-Stay with me?" Frank asked so quietly Gerard almost didn't understand what he said.

"How about this, you and O'Malley come up to the house for the night. I have a spare bedroom, I can make you both some food. I promise it will be okay." Gerard offered gently. Frank bit his lip while contemplating. There was another loud crack of thunder that made Frank scream and cover his ears again. Without thinking, Gerard moved to Frank's side and wrapped his arms around him. Frank stiffened and cried harder, but calmed down once he realized he wasn't being hurt. "Do you want to come to the house?" There was another bang of thunder that made Frank nod his head frantically. He didn't want to be alone and if he refused Gerard's offer, he would leave.

"Okay, come on, bring O'Malley." Gerard said gently as he stood up. Frank kept O'Malley tightly in his arms as he followed Gerard to the car. The rain had let up a bit, making it easier to be outside. O'Malley didn't seem to enjoy the car ride very much, but didn't freak out like Gerard thought he would. Once they got to the house, Gerard unlocked the door again and let Frank and O'Malley inside before following them.

Frank's heart was pounding as he looked around the house. The house definitely looked like a single man lived there. It was kinda messy, but not in a gross way. The walls were white and the floors were dark hard wood. The furniture was all black leather, there was a mantle with pictures sitting on it and art work hanging everywhere. The living room had two doors in the back of the room that were both closed, a staircase that was carpeted with an almost gray colored carpet, and an open doorway that led into the dining room and kitchen.

"Come on, I'll get you guys something to eat. You can put him down if you want." Gerard said, leading Frank through the dining room and to the kitchen. The kitchen was cleaner than Frank had expected, just a few dishes in the sink and some papers and magazines laying on the wooden counter top. "I've been meaning to re-decorate since I first moved in. You know, make the place more like me, but I still haven't found the time." Frank just nodded in response. O'Malley was becoming restless and struggling against Frank's hold, but he wasn't ready to let go of the cat just yet.

"Frank, I promise I won't hurt you or O'Malley. I promise you're safe here," Gerard said softly. Frank just looked down at the floor again. Gerard sighed before turning to the fridge. "So what do you want to eat?" He looked back at Frank who shrugged.

"I've got hot dogs, stuff to make sandwiches, cereal, oatmeal, and cans of soup. Or I can you some pancakes, I think I still have a couple of eggs, too. Does any of that sound good? I'll make a couple of hot dogs for O'Malley," Gerard said, taking out the package. He placed some on a plate and stuck them in the microwave. He looked back at Frank who was staring at the floor. He was shaking and Gerard wasn't sure if it was because he was cold or scared. Or maybe both.

"C-Cereal?" Frank asked.

"Okay, I'll make you some hot cereal, it's probably better for you, it'll warm you up some." Gerard said as he made the cereal. He took out O'Malley's hot dogs and put in Frank's cereal. Gerard cut up the hot dogs and put them on the floor. "It's okay Frank, you can let him down." Frank bit his lip before setting O'Malley in front of the plate. The cat instantly began eating, purring the whole time.

"Th-Thank you," Frank whispered when Gerard handed him his bowl.

"You're welcome," Gerard smiled. "There's sugar in that cabinet and butter and some fruit in the fridge if you want any of that." Frank stayed where he was.

"Alright, well, while you two eat, I'm gonna go make up the guest room for you guys, okay?" Gerard left the room and went upstairs. He went to the guest room that had a small bed big enough for one person in it. There wasn't really much in the room because he never really decorated it. The bed was actually the one from his old bedroom at his parent's house. He got it from their house when he moved in here, just to have something in the guest room so it wasn't empty.

The bed was already made, but he just wanted to give Frank some alone time so he could eat without feeling uncomfortable. He sat on the bed and waited for a few minutes, giving Frank enough time to eat. Once he was sure it had been enough time, he got up and went back downstairs. He found Frank sitting on the floor next to O'Malley, his empty bowl sitting on the empty plate.

"You two ready for bed?" Frank nodded and stood up, picking up the dishes. He held them up and stared at Gerard expectantly. "Oh, just stick them in the sink." After Frank put them in the sink, he picked up O'Malley and stood with a little distance between him and Gerard. Gerard led him upstairs and to the spare bedroom.

"O'Malley can sleep on the bed with you if he wants to. Um, bathroom is the next door over and I'm at the end of the hall if you need me. Do you need anything else?" Frank shook his head no, glancing around the room. "Okay, well, I'll leave you two alone. You can shut the door or leave it open, doesn't matter to me. Goodnight," Gerard said, smiling a little.

After Frank was sure Gerard was gone, he snuck over and shut the bedroom door quietly. He finally sat O'Malley on the floor who instantly ran over and jumped on the bed. Frank was still shaking and had tears burning his eyes. What had he done? He just put himself in a vulnerable position. There was no way to avoid getting hurt now. There wasn't a lock on the door and nothing to push against it expect the bed.

Frank stood in the middle of the room for a few minutes before walking over to the bed. He let out a small scream when the door opened again.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," Gerard said, sounding guilty. "I brought you something more comfortable to sleep in. They're probably too big, but it'll be okay for now." Gerard said, laying some clothes on the bed. Frank nodded his head, hoping it would be good enough. Gerard smiled before leaving again. Frank bit his lip and stared at the clothes before glancing back at the door. He finally grabbed the clothes and cracked the door open. The hallway light was on, making it easier for Frank to find the bathroom. He slipped into the bathroom and locked the door.

He hesitated for a moment before slowly taking his clothes off. His heart was still pounding and he felt sick. The clothes were big on him, he had to hold the pants up as he walked back to the guest room. O'Malley was still laying on the bed and lifted his head to meow at Frank when he came in.

"Shh," Frank whispered, afraid the cat would annoy Gerard. If he could just keep from pissing off Gerard, maybe he would be okay. He got under the covers and stared at the ceiling. It had been so long since he had been in a warm bed. He whimpered and pulled the covers over his head when he heard thunder rumbling in the distance, signaling a new storm moving in. He squeezed his eyes shut as tears began falling again. He was too scared and nervous to sleep, but at least he was warm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter wasn't too messy and all over the place. The next chapter will be better.


	4. Chapter 4

The first thing Gerard heard when he woke up was the faucet running and then footsteps going down the hall. He was confused for a moment before remembering Frank. He laid there for a few more minutes before hearing Frank go back to the bathroom and the faucet again. He furrowed his brow and got up. When he walked into the guest room, he found Frank scrubbing at a spot on the floor.

"What'cha doin'?" Gerard asked, causing Frank to whip around quickly. Gerard felt bad for scaring him. He looked so scared. "What happened?" Gerard asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eye. Frank shook his head no, looking like he might cry. Gerard stared at the wet spot on the floor, trying hard to figure out what happened.

"Did you spill something? If so, it's okay," Gerard said gently, walking over to where Frank was. The teen flinched away when Gerard got close. Once Gerard was close enough to whatever Frank was doing, he realized what had happened based on the smell. He looked over at O'Malley and sighed. "O'Malley pissed on the floor?"

"D-Don't hurt h-him, please." Frank begged quietly, tears starting to fall down his cheeks. 

"I'm not going to hurt him, Frank. It was my own fault. I let a cat in the house with no litter box. It's not a big deal. I have some cleaning products downstairs." Gerard smiled softly at Frank who reached up to wipe his cheeks. Gerard left the room and went downstairs to get the carpet cleaner. He went back upstairs and sprayed some of the cleaner on the spot while Frank tried to control his crying. 

"While that does it's thing, how about we get some breakfast?" Gerard stopped to look at Frank. "Do you want to take shower? You're welcome to, and I can wash your clothes for you." Frank bit his lip and stared at the floor.

"I promise I won't hurt you. You can wear my clothes until yours are clean, I don't mind." Frank shook his head no, not looking up causing Gerard to sigh. "Okay, how about this, I'll leave some clothes in the bathroom and go to the kitchen. If you decide you want to take a shower, you can. Just bring your clothes down to me after your done, okay?" Gerard asked, Frank only nodded, still staring at the floor.

"Alright," Gerard smiled. He went back to his room and got a clean pair of boxers, gray sweat pants, and a white t-shirt. He set them in the bathroom and got out a towel from the narrow closet behind the bathroom door. He set the towel and a rag on the counter before leaving and going downstairs. He began going through his cabinets and trying to decide what to make. Finally deciding to make chocolate chip pancakes. After he got everything out that he needed, he grabbed he took out his cell phone and dialed Mikey's number.

"Hello?" His brother asked, sleepily.

"Did I wake you?" Gerard asked, chuckling a little.

"It's fucking six A.M, what do you think?" Mikey said, yawning loudly. "What's up?"

"You remember Frank?" Mikey stayed quiet for a moment.

"The barn kid?" He finally asked.

"Yeah," Gerard said, struggling to mix the pancake batter in a bowl and talk on the phone at the same time.

"What about him?"

"Well, it stormed like a bitch last night and I went down to the barn to check on him. He was terrified, so I invited him to the house and-" Mikey cut him off.

"Wait, you invited him into your house? Gerard, do you know how dangerous that is? You don't know anything about the kid! He could have fucking murdered you in your sleep." Mikey scolded.

"He's too scared to do anything like that." Gerard defended. Mikey scoffed.

"And you're too gullible. It's probably an act. You know, get you to lower your defense so it's easier for him."

"Well, he didn't do anything. He slept here last night, him and his cat." Gerard told him.

"And why did you wake me up at six in the fucking morning to tell me? So I know who to look for if you're found dead?"

"No, he's not dangerous, Mikey.... I don't really know why I called. I guess I just wanted to know if you think I'm getting into something I shouldn't? I mean, the kid's obviously been through a lot. What if someone's looking for him? Like to hurt him? What happens if they find out he's here?" Gerard kept his voice quiet.

"Hand the kid over to save your ass." Mikey said, slightly sarcastic.

"I couldn't do that. Mikey, you should see the kid. He doesn't talk, he can hardly look at me, he's covered in scars. Something really bad happened to him. I can't just throw him back out tonight." Mikey sighed heavily.

"Turn him over to authorities. They're trained to deal with kids like him. Plus, can't you be like, arrested for not calling the police?" Mikey asked.

"What if he was abused? What if that's why he ran away? Or what if he abandoned? Or kicked out? They'll just send him back to whoever he's running from or he'll be put in a foster home that doesn't give a shit about him." Gerard said, flipping the pancake in the pan. He smiled a little when he heard the shower upstairs turn on.

"It's sad, but maybe it's what's best. You can't just keep him, Gerard. He's not a lost puppy." Mikey pointed out. Gerard sighed and stared at the pancake cooking in the pan.

"Alright, I'll try to figure out what happened to him. I don't want to put him in a dangerous situation though, so I don't think taking him to the police is a good idea just yet."

"Just watch your back, bro." Mikey said.

"I will," Gerard sighed.

"Can I go back to bed?" Mikey grumbled.

"Yeah," Gerard laughed. "Talk to ya later." He didn't get a reply, just a dial tone. He hung up and continued making the pancakes. He had made more than what was needed, just in case Frank was really hungry. When he got closer to being done, he got the hot dogs out and put four on a plate before sticking them in the microwave. After he was done with the pancakes, he put them on a tray and put them in the oven with it turned on low heat to keep them warm. He kept the oven door cracked open to prevent them from burning. He began making coffee while waiting for Frank to get done.

Frank was in the shower a lot longer than Gerard thought he would be. He didn't mind though, he was happy Frank finally got a relaxing shower. He smiled when Frank walked into the room with his clothes and towels in hand. Gerard stood up to take the items from him, taking them to the laundry room and throwing them in the washer.

"I made chocolate chip pancakes for us and hot dogs for O'Malley." Gerard said, setting the plate on the floor when the cat came into the room. Gerard went over and got the tray out of the oven, setting it on the stove. He then grabbed two plates and put two pancakes on each one before setting them on the table. "What do you want to drink? I have orange juice, Coke, milk, water, coffee, and I also have chocolate powder if you want chocolate milk." Gerard said while putting everything else needed on the table. He looked at Frank for a reply but only got a shrug.

"It's okay to talk to me, Frank. Which would you prefer more?" Gerard asked gently, hoping not to intimidate the boy.

"Um, orange-" Frank cut himself off, looking scared.

"Orange juice it is," Gerard smiled. He got a glass and filled it up before taking it to the table along with his cup of coffee. "Come on, sit down and eat." Gerard smiled at Frank again. Frank hesitated for a moment before taking a seat at the table. He watched as Gerard spread a generous amount of peanut butter on to his pancakes before taking a bigger bite than necessary. Frank picked up his fork and cut a small piece of pancake before putting it in his mouth. He stared down at his plate the entire time he ate, trying to pretend that the man across the table wasn't watching him.

"So I was thinking last night that it's really not good for you to be living in a barn alone. Especially with winter coming up. Um, how would you feel about just staying here?" Frank stopped what he was doing, fork halfway to his mouth. Why would Gerard want him to stay here? He'll just get in the way and be a burden. But the idea of going back to that barn wasn't appealing either. Would Gerard expect payment?

"P-Payment?" Frank asked, staring down. Gerard was confused for a second before shaking his head even though Frank wasn't looking at him.

"No, I don't want payment of any kind. I'm just offering you a place to stay. No strings attached," Gerard said, trying to get it across to Frank. Tears burned Frank's eyes. Gerard couldn't be any worse than his uncle and he'll just starve to death on his own. He couldn't go back to his uncle. It was either stay with Gerard or go back to the barn.

"O'Malley?" Frank asked, looking over at the cat.

"He can stay here, too. We'll go to the store today and get what he needs. We'll also need to get you some clothes and stuff. I should also get some food. What do you like?" Gerard asked, standing up and grabbing a notepad off of the counter before digging around for a pen. Gerard began writing down foods they needed to buy while he finished eating. "You don't have to be afraid of me, Frank. What would you like me to get?" Frank shrugged causing Gerard to sigh. They sat in silence while Gerard finished making out the list.

Frank stared down at what was left of his pancakes. He'd only eaten half of them and was already feeling nauseous from forcing himself to eat a couple more bites. He glanced up at Gerard who was still working on the grocery list. Gerard would be angry if he wasted food, Frank just knew it. Gerard pushing his chair back caused Frank to jump. Gerard looked at him apologetically before walking towards the laundry room. After switching out the laundry, Gerard came back.

"I'm gonna go take a shower. You can watch TV or whatever. If you need anything just knock on the door, okay? Oh, and there's another bathroom off of the living room if you need it." Gerard explained before leaving. Frank sat at the table and stared at his food. Why hadn't Gerard gotten mad? He couldn't finish the rest of the food, not right now anyway. He stood up and carried the plate to the counter.

He began looking through the cabinets until he found some plastic wrap. After wrapping up what remained of his food, he began clearing out a spot in the fridge. There was plenty of room, but he re-arranged everything so the bottom shelf was completely empty before placing his plate on it. He then began putting away the rest, making sure to put them on a different shelf than the one his own plate was on.

When he went to put the plastic wrap away, he was stopped by the sight of the sharp blade inside the box. He looked over his shoulder and then back at the metal strip. He bit his lip and raised his wrist to the metal. After standing there for a few moments, he just closed the box. If he got blood on Gerard's things, he would be mad. He shouldn't even be wearing Gerard's clothes. He was ruining them.

He wanted to wash dishes, but wasn't sure if Gerard would allow it. He stood in the middle of the kitchen, not knowing what to do with himself. He jumped when the dryer buzzed in the other room. He went to get his clothes out. He left the rest of the laundry in a basket before going to the downstairs bathroom to change into his own clothes. He had to admit, being clean and having clean clothes was nice. He looked around in the bathroom for an old razor. It appeared that Gerard was good at throwing out old ones and Frank wouldn't dare steal a new one.

When Frank finally stepped out of the room, he jumped when he saw Gerard. Frank held up the clothes Gerard had let him borrow, silently asking what he wanted done with them.

"Oh, you can just throw them in that hamper in the laundry room." Gerard said, motioning in the direction of the laundry room. Frank kept his head down as he quickly walked past Gerard. He carefully placed the items in the hamper before returning to the kitchen where Gerard was at.

"Are you ready to go to the store?" Frank shook his head no. "Why not?" Frank opened his mouth to speak only to shut it and shake his head no again. He wanted to tell Gerard he was afraid of being caught by his uncle's friends, but then he would have to tell Gerard why. He wasn't ready for that. What if it makes Gerard mad?

Gerard walked over to the fridge and took the small dry-erase board off of it and grabbed a marker out of the cup on the counter. Frank backed up a step when Gerard got close to him.

"Here, since you're not big on talking, how about writing? If you want to say anything, you can write it down for me. The marker even has an eraser on the cap, see?" Gerard held the marker out to Frank. With shaky hands, Frank took the board and marker from Gerard. "Okay, now why don't you want to go to the store?" Frank stared down before writing a simple reply.

 **"I'm scared,"** was scrawled across the board.

"Why are you scared?" Gerard asked, hoping the boy would tell him what had happened in the past.

 **"I don't want to talk about it."** Frank turned the board around, head down out of fear. Had he told his uncle that, he would have been slapped. He worried Gerard would do the same.

"I need you to go with me to pick out clothes." Gerard pointed out. Frank had tears burning his eyes out of frustration. Why wasn't Gerard understanding? Gerard's sigh caused Frank to flinch. He was getting mad. "How about this, I go to the other stores and get everything we need, then I'll come get you to go to Goodwill?" Frank only nodded his head, hoping Gerard wouldn't demand a reply.

"Alright, you can stay here and I'll be back in a little while. Are you sure there's nothing specific you want or need?" Frank shook his head no again. "Alright, you can do whatever you want, just please don't leave, okay? Oh, and please don't mess with the stuff in my art room." Frank nodded his head, glancing up at Gerard.

 **"Can I go upstairs?"** Frank held the board up and Gerard nodded.

"Yeah, go ahead," Gerard smiled. Frank turned and left the room. Gerard waited until he heard a door shut upstairs before gathering what he need to leave. He really didn't want to leave Frank alone. What if something happens? What if Mikey's right and this all an act? No, he can't start thinking of Frank that way. He sighed heavily and grabbed his phone.

"Hey, what's up?" Ray asked when he answered.

"I need a favor," Gerard said.

"Okay?" Ray replied, sounding confused. Gerard hardly ever asked others for favors.

"I don't have time to explain right now, but that kid from the barn is staying with me now. I need to go to the store, but I'm not sure about leaving him here alone." Gerard explained, glancing towards the doorway.

"So what? You want me to come over and babysit?" Ray asked, chuckling a little.

"Well, kinda," Gerard admitted, scratching the back of his neck. Ray was quiet for a moment before sighing.

"Be there in a few minutes. But I expect the full story later." Ray said before hanging up. Gerard ran a hand through his hair. Frank wasn't going to take this well.

\-------------------

Frank stayed hidden in the guest room, cowering under the blankets. The strange man he couldn't remember the name of was still downstairs watching TV; the volume turned up just loud enough that Frank could hear the mumbling of whatever show he was watching. Gerard promised the wild haired man wouldn't hurt him. He even compared him to a teddy bear, but it didn't help. The man had only come to check on him twice since Gerard left. Both times Frank had hidden under the blankets, not moving or replying to the man.

Frank whimpered and held the blankets tighter when he heard footsteps coming up the stairs. Every time the man came into the room, Frank expected to be hurt. The man was only going to take so much of his hiding before he got mad. The door cracked open again, but the man didn't say anything, causing Frank's heart to beat faster. Tears began falling down his cheeks as the man came into the room and towards the bed. He didn't want to be hurt again.

"Hey, are you okay?" The stranger asked softly, standing close to the bed. "Gerard told me you don't really speak. He also said you're scared and anxious. I won't hurt ya, kid. You're welcome to come watch TV with me." He offered. Frank stayed frozen under the covers, trying to stop his crying. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly when the man sat on the bed.

"Will you please remove the blankets?" He asked, tugging on them gently. Frank finally gave in and pushed the blankets down just enough to see the man who gave him a kind smile. "Will you talk to me? Or write, I guess." He handed Frank the board and marker. Frank hesitated before pushing his blankets off a little more and taking the board and marker. Maybe if he behaved the man wouldn't hurt him as badly.

"I'm Ray," he said, smiling again. "So, how old are you?" Frank wrote on the board before showing it to Ray.

**"16."**

"Sixteen, okay, no offense, but you look younger." Ray chuckled but Frank just stared at him. Ray stayed quiet for a few moments, looking around the room. Frank really wished the man would leave. He was slightly happy when a door opened downstairs. "Oh, Gee must be home." Ray got up and left, shutting the door behind him. Frank sat up and tried to hear what was being said between the two men. He finally gave up when all he heard were mumbles.

\--------------------

Gerard laid the bags down on the table while Ray went to grab the rest from the car. He opened the fridge and furrowed his eyebrows. Frank had wrapped what remained of his breakfast and put it on a cleared shelf. Gerard knew for a fact there had been other things on that shelf. Why had Frank moved them?

He turned around to find Frank standing there.

"Jesus Christ, kid!" Gerard yelled, hand on his heart. "You're so fucking quiet," Gerard chuckled. He grabbed some more things to put in the fridge.

"Sorry," Frank mumbled.

"It's okay. Oh, why did you clear this shelf off?" Gerard asked, pointing towards the shelf. Frank began writing on the board in his hand. He then held it out for Gerard.

"You didn't want your stuff too close to mine?" Gerard asked, reading what Frank had wrote. "Why does it matter?" He handed the board back to Frank who erased it and began writing something new. He turned it around to show Gerard.

 **"Because anything of mine is disgusting."** Gerard looked up at Ray who was placing things in a cabinet. Ray had a sympathetic look on his face as he watched what was happening between the two.

"Why do you think that?" Frank shook his head no. "Don't wanna talk about it?" Frank shook his head again.

"I don't think it's disgusting, Frank. You don't have to separate your things from mine." Gerard gave him a kind smile even though Frank was staring at the floor. "So Ray told me your age. I kinda thought you were younger." Gerard chuckled.

"That's what I told him," Ray said. Frank wasn't sure why it made him blush. He had always been kinda small and was really underweight. He had lost a lot of weight in the four years he lived with his uncle, and he was sure he had lost more in the four months he had lived on his own. He stood quietly while the two men talked about everything from him to work while they put the groceries away.

"I got O'Malley a litter box and some litter, is he even litter box trained?" Gerard asked, looking back at Frank who only shrugged. "Well, maybe we can train him. I also got cat food, canned food, some treats, a food bowl and water bowl, and a couple of toys." Frank forced a small smile. He was happy Gerard was being nice to O'Malley. Had it been his uncle he probably would have hurt the cat -especially after what happened this morning- and then beat Frank for even thinking about bringing that cat into the house.

"Frank, are you ready to go to Goodwill?" Frank only shrugged. The idea of Gerard spending even more money on him made Frank's stomach churn. Gerard was definitely going to want payment for everything he's done today, and he knew exactly what Gerard would demand as payment. "Well, go put your shoes on and we'll go. It's pretty decent out, so you won't have to worry about getting cold. Oh, and why don't you take this stuff up and get O'Malley settled?" Frank didn't say anything or even look up, he just grabbed what he could carry, turned and left. Had he done that with his uncle, Rick would have stormed up to him and hit him hard enough to send him to the floor.

When Frank had taken everything upstairs and left the room for the last time, Ray turned to Gerard.

"How are you paying for all of this? Pets aren't cheap and neither are clothes or food for two." Ray said cautiously, worried about over stepping his boundaries. He leaned against the sink with his hands on the edge behind him while Gerard leaned against the counter across from him with his arms crossed. 

"Well, it's just one cat, so I bought one of the little bags of food, the canned food is like sixty-nine cents, and the treats, toys, and bowls all came from the dollar store. The litter box and litter were the two most expensive. I didn't really get much food, but it's enough to get us by. Plus, I have some money saved back that I'm going to use to buy him clothes. Goodwill clothes are pretty cheap." Gerard explained.

"Gerard, I know you want to help this kid, but you can't blow through your entire savings for him and his cat." Gerard sighed, he had already gotten one lecture from Mikey, he didn't need it from Ray, too.

"Look, I want to help him. He definitely needs it because he's not getting it anywhere else. And before you mention turning him over to authorities, I can't. Not yet, anyway. I don't know what happened to him but it couldn't have been good. And they might just send him back to whatever he's hiding from. Or he could be put in a foster home and we've all heard stories about those." Gerard said, cringing at the horrible stories he had heard. Like kids being chained to their beds and not fed for weeks at a time. He couldn't put Frank through that. Plus, he would never know if that was happening or if Frank went somewhere nice.

"Foster care systems have improved. Especially in the area after what happened a few years ago to those one kids being chained up. That was both from those people being heartless assholes and the neglect of social workers. It's improved though and Frank would be okay. Also... Gerard, you can't raise a kid. Especially not one as fucked up as this one." Gerard cut him off.

"God, you make it sound like I'm taking in a five year old. He's fucking sixteen, Ray. He doesn't need me to raise him, he just needs someone to care for him."

"And what about school? Doctors appointments? Dentist appointments? Can he even drive yet? If not, you'll have to figure out how to get him a license because he has to have his birth certificate and like two forms of ID. Then there's getting a car and getting a job. And what about after he graduates? Are you just going to send him on his merry way and hope he makes it? He's in no condition to be living on his own and I don't think he would make it very long alone at college.

"Gerard, there's a lot to taking care of a teenage. He may be almost eighteen, but he's not close to it mentally. You're not his legal guardian, so even if he was in a good place mentally, you can't enroll him in school. And how long has he been out of school? How much catching up does he need? He can't get a job because he's too timid. He may be close to eighteen, but he won't mentally be an adult for a long time. You're going to be taking care of him for more than just two years. I know you want to help him, and I admire you for stepping up, but there's a lot more to taking care of someone in his state than you realize." Gerard bit his lip and stared at the floor. He honestly hadn't thought of all of that. All he cared about was getting Frank warm, fed, and safe.

"I can't just throw him out to the mercy of strangers, Ray." Gerard knew it wasn't a really an argument, especially since Ray was right. There was a lot more to taking care of Frank than Gerard had thought about. Ray sighed and ran a hand over his face.

"Maybe he knows where he was born and can get a birth certificate through the state. I think you can fill out a form to get one, but I think he has to have some sort of identification. Also, there's always home-schooling." Ray paused to take a deep breath, staring at Gerard. "If you really want to take this kid in, I'll help you the best I can. But if something happens and he ends up like in the hospital or something, they're going to want to contact his parents or legal guardians, and if you lie and they found out, you can get into a lot of trouble. Then if they do manage to track down a guardian or parent, they could turn around and accuse you of kidnapping him or something. Plus you could get in trouble for harboring a runaway. This is illegal, Gerard." Gerard wasn't sure how to reply, but Frank returning saved him from having to.

"You ready?" Gerard asked, Frank nodded his head. "You want to come with us?" He asked, looking over at Ray.

"Nah, I have some stuff I gotta get done." Ray gave Frank a soft smile when the teen looked up at him. Frank's eyes widened slightly before looking back to the floor.

"Alright, let's go then. Don't forget your board and marker." Gerard said, grabbing his keys while Frank grabbed the board and marker.

\-------------------------

"Okay, what about this?" Gerard asked, holding up another shirt. Frank glanced at it before shrugging and looking back down. Gerard sighed and ran hand over his face. They had been at Goodwill for an hour already and Frank hadn't picked out a single thing yet. Gerard had finally gotten Frank to tell him his size and had been holding up clothes to get Frank's opinion of ever since.

"Alright, how about I just pick out some clothes for you? Because we're not getting anywhere doing it this way." Gerard said, trying to keep the agitation out of his voice. He knew Frank wasn't being difficult on purpose. Frank only nodded. Gerard went back through and picked up some of the shirts he had already showed Frank. He didn't seem repulsed by the clothes. Then he picked out a couple of pairs of jeans. "Are you positive these will fit? Or do you need to try them on?" Frank began writing on his board before holding it up.

 **"I'm positive."** Gerard nodded.

"Alright, well, I think we're done here, then." Gerard smiled, happy to finally be done. After checking out, they carried the bags to the car. "Now we're just going to make a quick stop at Wal-Mart and we can head back to the house." Frank only nodded, keeping his head down and twiddling his fingers. Gerard turned the radio up a bit and began singing along to the CD playing.

Frank bit his lip and glanced at Gerard out the corner of his eye. The sound of the man singing was soothing. His mom used to sing around the house a lot. He really missed it.

"Do you like music?" Gerard asked, Frank nodded. Gerard smiled, parking in the Wal-Mart parking lot. "Okay, I'll ask you out here instead of inside, do you know what size underwear you need? Also socks and we're getting you a new pair of shoes." Frank wanted to argue, but didn't want to make Gerard mad. He finally wrote down the sizes on the board and showed it to Gerard. Gerard read over them a couple of times to be sure he remembered them.

Gerard noticed Frank was shaking so he decided to make this a quick trip. He knew what they were getting, so it wouldn't take long.

\-----------------------

As soon as they got back to the house, Frank sat on the floor with O'Malley in his arms. He looked like he was close to a breakdown. Gerard left him alone while carrying the bags inside and up to Frank's room. After he finished with that, he went to the kitchen.

"How about sandwiches for lunch?" Gerard called to Frank who was still on the living room floor. He didn't get a reply, which wasn't surprising to him. He began pulling out everything they needed to make sandwiches and placed it all on the table. "Frank, come eat," Gerard cringed at himself. He sounded just like a parent talking to a little kid. Frank came into the kitchen with O'Malley in his hands. The cat was squirming around, but Frank held him tight.

As they made their sandwiches -Gerard having to push Frank a little- Gerard noticed Frank was avoiding the lunch meat. It seemed Frank did that a lot.

"Do you not eat meat?" Frank's eyes widened like the question scared him. He slowly put his hands in his lap, staring down at his half-made sandwich. He finally nodded his head, acting as if he were ashamed of it. "Oh, well, that's okay. I have some stuff you can eat and we can get you some vegetarian things later. Okay?" Frank looked up at Gerard in confusion. Why wasn't he yelling? Rick told him it was selfish to act the way he does. He should just eat whatever was put in front of him without bitching about it. But Gerard was being... nice. It was weird.

"I can make you a grilled cheese with tomatoes." Gerard offered. Frank shook his head before writing on his board Gerard had placed on the table.

 **"Thank you. I don't want to bug you though."** Gerard gave him a little smile.

"You're not bugging me, Frank. Here, let me go make one for you." Gerard grabbed what he needed before going to the stove. Frank sat there and watched Gerard. He knew it was just an act. He was just doing all of this so that he had more to hold against Frank when he demanded sex in return for everything. Frank knew he wouldn't have a choice but to give in. He really would owe Gerard a lot after everything he's done. That doesn't mean Frank was looking forward to the pain it caused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to make something clear, I have nothing against the foster care system or social workers. There was a case near me a few years ago of foster parents chaining up the kids and social services were very neglectful (which sadly has happened in other places, too). It's caused a lot of people to look down on foster care. But it helped the system to improve in my area.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone reading! I appreciate all the kudos, bookmarks, and comments! :)

Gerard sat at the desk in his art room. The house was silent except for the thunder rumbling outside. It had been a week since he took Frank in and not much had really changed. The teen mostly stayed in his room, only coming out when Gerard called him. It was starting to feel kind of normal, though he did wish Frank would trust him more. He couldn't even get him to come downstairs to watch TV.

Gerard stopped what he was drawing to watch the rain flood down the window. It was another stormy night, but it wasn't too bad. Occasionally there would be a loud bang of thunder that sounded louder in the too quiet house. Gerard loved storms. It made him feel calm and more creative. But he knew Frank hated them. He had checked on the teen once at the beginning of the storm to find him under the covers with a flashlight and book. He seemed okay even if he hadn't removed the covers to look at Gerard. But now it was storming harder which made Gerard worry about Frank.

Gerard got up and went to Frank's room, knocking softly. He opened the door since he knew he wouldn't get a reply. Frank was sitting with his knees to his chest and arms securely around them. He still had tears sliding down his cheeks. Gerard gave him a sympathetic smile before nodding his head toward the door.

"Come on, you can come hang with me instead of in here alone." Gerard sort of expected Frank to refuse, but instead he got out of the bed and began following Gerard back to the art room. Frank stopped in the doorway, not wanting to go into the room. "What's wrong?"

"You s-said I, um, I c-can't come.... um, in-in here." Frank fumbled over his words, staring at the floor.

"Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that. I just meant for you to not mess with certain things. Like my paints because they're expensive, or my work. You're allowed in here," Gerard assured, motioning for him to come in. "Do you draw?"

"Kinda," Frank mumbled, looking around the room. There were canvases set up around the room, the white walls were pretty much covered in artwork, there were two black, plastic shelves in the corner with various things on them, the desk had shelves down both sides that were full of stuff, and the top of the desk was messy except for a big enough area to work on.

"Here, you can draw if you want." Gerard dug through the books on the desk shelves, pulling out a plain, black one. He grabbed a pen out of the cup on the desk and an eraser. He held them out to Frank who hesitated before taking them.

"Th-Thank you," Frank said quietly. He looked around the room, not sure what to do now.

"You can sit down," Gerard told him, motioning to the couch. Frank walked over and sat cross-legged on the couch while Gerard went back to the desk. Frank didn't want to waste Gerard's stuff, so he placed the items on the couch beside him. He watched Gerard as he worked. He was so focused on whatever he was drawing. There was a bright flash of lightning and a loud bang of thunder that caused Frank to cry out in fear and pushed himself into the couch more. "You okay?" Gerard asked, turning around to look at him. Frank nodded his head, though his body shaking gave him away. Gerard stood up and walked over to the couch. He left some room between him and Frank, not wanting to upset Frank more.

"How about I sit over here with you?" Gerard gave him a smile. Gerard went back to what he was drawing and now that Gerard was closer, Frank could actually watch. He watched as Gerard's hand moved the pencil over the page, drawing a skeleton that looked like it was screaming at the sky. "Aren't you going to draw?" Gerard asked, looking at the sketch pad and pencil in between them. Frank shook his head no.

"Oh, okay," Gerard said, turning back to his sketch. He had learned that pushing Frank to do most things resulted in the teen getting upset. The only time he pushed Frank was when it was for his own benefit.

Another loud clap of thunder made Frank smack his hands over his ears and squeeze his eyes shut. Gerard hated that he couldn't help Frank. He wanted to reach out and offer a comforting touch, but knew Frank wouldn't like it. He watched Frank, waiting for him to calm down. Frank finally opened his eyes which met Gerard's. Gerard reached his hand towards Frank, causing him to flinch away. Gerard carefully took Frank's right wrist and tugged on it gently. Frank lowered his hands back to his lap.

Neither one said anything. The only sounds were the thunder and rain. Frank was still shaking and breathing heavy.

"Why are you so scared?" Gerard asked, hoping Frank would actually tell him. Frank fidgeted with the hem of his shirt and stared down. He finally made a motion with his right hand like he was writing. "Oh, where's your board?" Gerard stood up and left the room. He went to Frank's room and found the board and marker on the bed. He came back and handed them to Frank who took them with shaky hands. "So why are you so scared?" Gerard asked again. Frank stared at the board before he began writing.

 **"I hate loud noises."** Gerard couldn't stop the small chuckle that escaped his lips. He felt bad the moment he saw the hurt look Frank gave him.

"Oh, no, it's just I kinda figured that part out. I meant why do you hate loud noises?" Frank wrote on his board again.

**"My therapist said it's from anxiety."**

"Oh, okay," Gerard wasn't sure what to really say. "So, you were in therapy?" Gerard knew he shouldn't push Frank, but he really wanted to know what he was getting himself into. If there was some psycho living in his house, he had a right to know. Though he doubted Frank was psychotic.

 **"When I was a kid."** Frank was squirming around a bit, obviously uncomfortable. Gerard didn't want to push Frank too far, but he wanted more information.

"Why did you stop going?" Frank bit his lip and stared at the board. He finally erased it and began writing.

 **"I moved in with my uncle."** Frank really didn't want to get too into detail. What if Gerard gets mad? What if he attacks him and then throws him out? Or turns him over to the police so they could send him back to Rick? No, he couldn't let Gerard know what happened to him.

"Why did you move in the your uncle? And why did you stop going because of that?" Gerard asked, furrowing his brow. He kind of figured that the uncle had hurt Frank and maybe denied him access to a therapist he obviously needed, but he wanted the story from Frank. He didn't want to make assumptions.

 **"My mom died."** Frank wrote, keeping his eyes down. Gerard decided not to push him to answer the second question he had asked. If Frank's uncle really did hurt him, he obviously wouldn't want to talk about it.

"Where was your dad?" Gerard asked, his tone sympathetic.

 **"Never knew him."** Gerard noticed Frank's eyes filling with tears. He felt bad for asking Frank about his personal life, but he had to know.

"I'm sorry," Gerard said. He wanted to comfort Frank, but decided against it. "Were you close to your mom?" Frank only nodded, a tear finally slipping out.

"Do you want to talk about her? Some times it helps," Gerard offered. Frank stayed quiet and for a moment Gerard thought Frank wasn't going to reply, but he finally wrote something on his board.

 **"She was the only person who cared about me."** That sentence alone was enough to break Gerard's heart. Did Frank really believe nobody cared about him?

"No, she's not. I care about you. I know it's not much since we don't really know each other. I do care about you though. Why else would I take you in?" Gerard said, trying to make Frank realize he was cared for. Frank wanted to point out that Gerard only wanted him as a toy, something he could use for his own pleasure, but decided against it. He really didn't want to anger Gerard. If he could post-pone the beating he was undoubtedly going to get, he would. "Do you have siblings?" Gerard decided to change the subject. Frank shook his head no.

"Oh, I have a younger brother, Mikey. Maybe you can meet him some time." Frank just gave him a small smile and a nod. It fell silent after that.

\--------------------------------

As the storm died down outside, Frank laid down on the couch. Gerard had moved back over to the desk and was busy with whatever he was drawing. Frank wasn't one hundred percent comfortable putting himself in a vulnerable position, but if Gerard was going to hurt him he would have already. It wasn't like Frank could stop him if he barged into the guest room and demanded sex.

Frank refused to let his tired eyes close but was slowly losing the fight. His eyes would slide close only for him to force them open again before yawning. He didn't want to go back to that bedroom though. In an odd way, Gerard made him feel safe. That doesn't mean he trusts the man, he just felt safer with Gerard. If the man really wanted to hurt him, he would have already done it. He had plenty of opportunities, but he wouldn't even touch Frank unless necessary. And Frank would take Gerard over his uncle or uncle's friends any day.

Gerard looked back to see Frank sleeping. He was curled up on the couch in a protective way. It was sad that the teen couldn't even relax in sleep; he was always on guard. Gerard turned back to his work. He didn't want to wake Frank since he wasn't sure how much sleep he really got. Between living in that barn and now pretty much with a stranger, he guessed Frank didn't sleep much.

He continued working on his comic about the ghost boy. He wasn't sure it would ever be published and if it was, he didn't know if it would be popular. But it was a start. He looked up to watch the rain run down the window. The storm had died down to distant rumbles and steady rain. He glanced back at Frank whose face was slightly scrunched up in discomfort, leaving Gerard to wonder if he was having a bad dream. He quietly got out of his chair and slipped out the door. He grabbed his laptop from his bedroom before returning.

After quietly sitting back down, Gerard opened the laptop and started it up. He began looking up laws on harboring a runaway teen. He knew it was illegal but wondered if it was the same when it came to teens. After reading through some websites, he learned that harboring teens wasn't illegal if abuse or neglect played a part in the child running away, but he could be held accountable for not reporting the abuse or neglect to the police. If those aren't a factor in why Frank ran away then Frank's uncle could sue him for not turning Frank over to authorities. Frank would have to be the one to say he was abused or neglected at home. If he doesn't, Gerard could end up being fined an amount determined by the court.

But if Frank had been abused or neglected -which obviously happened to some degree- Gerard could ask to be Frank's guardian until he turns eighteen. Of course the court and social services would have to approve and agree that Gerard was fit to be his guardian. But if a family member steps in and asks to take Frank, they will most likely win against Gerard. It really just depends on who is better fit to care for Frank. What scared Gerard was that if he was granted guardianship of Frank, then he would be taking over all responsibilities for a kid. Did he even have the money to take care of him?

If the court decides Frank should return home, he will be placed in court custody. He'll be put in family counseling until it's decided that he should return home. That scared Gerard because it was obvious Frank was running from something, but if he didn't tell the court why he ran away than he could be put in court custody. Gerard didn't want to see Frank end up back in a dangerous situation, but the court won't listen to him if Frank doesn't admit that he was in danger at home.

From everything Gerard gathered, the only way to keep from being fined or even arrested was to get Frank to tell him what happened.

\-------------------------

It was late when Gerard decided to go to bed. He wasn't sure if he should wake up Frank or leave him on the couch. He finally decided to take him back to his room. He very gently put his arms under Frank, one behind his head and one under his knees. He lifted him up and cradled him in his arms. He was careful not to run him into the door frames as he moved him to the guest room. He gently laid him down on the bed. He was kind of surprised Frank didn't wake up but he was also happy.

He covered Frank while O'Malley jumped on the bed to get comfortable. He shut the light off and left the door ajar. When he got to his room he laid down. He decided he would talk to Frank about being a runaway in the morning. He couldn't end up in trouble while trying to help Frank. If he was really going to help, he needed Frank to realize the importance of talking to him.

He glanced at the clock to see it was three A.M. He grabbed his phone and began typing a message to Mikey, figuring his brother was asleep but knew he would answer in the morning.

 _"What the hell have I gotten myself into? I need some help, dude." -Gerard._ He didn't expect a reply tonight but got one almost instantly.

_"What did the kid do? And what kind of help?" -Mikey._

_"Nothing, I Googled the laws for keeping a runaway kid. If he wasn't abused or neglected, I can get fined or even arrested. I don't know, I just need help." -Gerard._ He ran his hands over his face and sighed heavily.

 _"Maybe you should call the police. I know you want to help him, but it's not worth getting your ass thrown in jail. Turn him over to authorities. If you really want to help him, then do the responsible thing." -Mikey._ Gerard stared at the ceiling. He knew turning Frank over would be the responsible thing to do, but he felt like there was way more going on than just Frank being a runaway. Frank would be asked questions about why he ran away. He's in no condition to answer those questions by himself. If he doesn't give them a real reason to keep him out of that house, he'll be sent back.

_"I'm gonna talk to him in the morning and decide what to do from there." -Gerard._

_"Like I said before, he's not a lost puppy. You can't just keep him because you found him alone. He obviously has a home and you need to return him." -Mikey._

_"I wish you stop comparing him to a dog. He's a scared kid. I can't just throw him back into a house where he might be getting hurt." -Gerard._

_"Then tell social services. Based on how he acts, they'll know something is wrong and help him." -Mikey._

_"Yeah, they'll put him in family counseling so he can later return home." -Gerard._

_"Well, that's up to the court, not you." -Mikey._ Gerard sighed heavily and rubbed at his eyes. Why weren't people understanding his position? He couldn't live with himself knowing he sent Frank back to an abusive home. But he also wasn't sure he could take care of Frank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Googled laws on harboring runaway teens, so hopefully I get this stuff right. Also, some chaos is gonna happen in the next chapter. ;)


	6. Chapter 6

Frank sat at the table shaking. Gerard told him they needed to talk and he was terrified what that meant. He glanced over to watch Gerard fix breakfast. The man was humming softly as he worked on making pancakes. In all honesty, Frank was tired of pancakes. He ate them every day since getting here, but he wouldn't dare complain. It was better than not being allowed to eat.

Gerard set the plate of pancakes on the table that was already set. He went back to the kitchen and got two glasses of orange juice before returning to the table. He put a pancake on Frank's plate before placing two on his own. Frank wouldn't serve himself and he never managed to eat two pancakes, so Gerard started giving him one at a time. Frank never accepted a second pancake though.

"Okay, so we really need to talk." Gerard said, stuffing more food than necessary into his mouth. Frank put a small bite in his mouth, staring down at the plate. He wasn't hungry due to his nerves making his stomach churn. "I really need you to tell me what happened to cause you to run away. Or if you were kicked out. I can get in a lot of trouble for keeping you here if you just ran away because you were mad. If your uncle... hurt you or wasn't taking care of you like he should, I need to know." Gerard kept his tone soft as if he were talking to a child and chose his words carefully. The last thing he wanted to do was scare Frank more. He didn't mention the police because he didn't know how Frank would react.

 **"Can I write it all down?"** Frank asked, holding up the board but not looking at Gerard.

"Of course," Gerard smiled. This was going a lot better than he thought it would. He expected Frank to put up a fight. "You do understand why I need to know right? If your uncle comes looking for you, I can be fined or under certain circumstances even arrested. If you really do need help, I'll help you. But I can't help you unless you tell me what happened." Frank wrote on his board again.

 **"No police,"** was scrawled on the board. Gerard sighed and ran a hand over his face.

"Frank, I have to tell the police. I know you're scared, but I promise I will do everything I can to make sure you're safe. Even if it means you can't stay with me." Gerard didn't expect those words to hurt as much as they did. He may have only known Frank for a couple of weeks, but he had a strange attachment to the teen. There was something about him that made Gerard want to protect him.

 **"I'm not going back to Rick."** Frank had tears running down his cheeks and was refusing to look up at Gerard.

"Well, if Rick hurt you, they won't send you back." Gerard explained gently.

 **"I'm not going back."** Frank wrote again.

"If you talk to me and tell me what he did, you won't have to. But if we don't tell police what he did, then they'll send you back." Gerard decided there was no use in hiding anything from Frank. Maybe this will encourage Frank to tell him everything.

 **"I'll leave again."** Frank was full on crying now. He couldn't go back to Rick. He would rather kill himself than go back there.

"Frank, please just write everything down and we can figure this all out. Okay?" Frank nodded his head.

\-----------------------

Frank sat on his bed with O'Malley curled up beside him. He kept running his hand over the cat's soft fur. He stared down at the notebook and pencil Gerard had given him. He was supposed to write down everything. Gerard was very clear about that. Everything from the start. Gerard claimed the more evidence they had, the better the chance he wouldn't be sent back. He really didn't want to be sent back, but he also didn't want to tell Gerard everything. The man would think he's disgusting.

He finally picked up the pencil with a shaky hand. He wasn't sure how to start or what to write. Rick had done a lot to him over the years and he didn't want to re-live them over again. He tried to start writing, but couldn't get his hand to move. He ended up making light scribbles on the page from his hand shaking so much.

He couldn't do it. He couldn't tell Gerard what Rick had done to him. It was humiliating and disgusting. Gerard wouldn't want to help him anymore after finding out what he let happen to him.

Frank got up off of the bed and sneaked out of his room. He didn't know if Gerard would be waiting on him. It would be easier if the man was at work. Once Frank was sure Gerard wouldn't come up to him, he quietly made his way to the bathroom, glancing into the art room to find it empty. Once he was in the bathroom, he began digging through the drawers. He learned that Gerard had a razor that he could change the blades on, meaning there were spare razor blades somewhere.

After locating the box, Frank opened it and took one of the blades out. He hadn't cut since him and Gerard got his stuff from the barn and he found his razor missing. His only explanation was that he hadn't put it back in the trunk after using it last. He still didn't want to waste Gerard's things, but he desperately needed this. He removed his shirt and instantly began slicing at his body. Something had to be wrong with him. He was dealing with pain by causing pain. Normal people don't do that. Normal people don't find comfort in cutting themselves open.

Frank's body was burning by the time he was done. He didn't mind though, it was better than the internal pain he felt. He wasn't worth saving. Gerard should just take him back to Rick. Everything Rick did to him is what he deserved. He was worthless and filthy. He doesn't deserve anything more than what Rick gave him.Even though blood was already running down his body, he began making more cuts. He sobbed while slicing at his body.

_Worthless._

_Whore._

_Ugly._

_Ungrateful._

_Burden._

_I wish you were dead._

All of Rick's harsh words flooded through Frank's mind as he continued slicing at his body. He wanted the pain and blood to wash out all of the hurtful words and things that man did to him. If Rick wasn't here to hurt him then he would hurt himself. It's what he deserves after all.

Frank gasped and dropped the blade when the door suddenly opened. Gerard began to apologize before actually looking at Frank.

"My god! What the hell did you do?" Gerard yelled, rushing to Frank. He grabbed a towel and began dabbing at the blood. "What the fuck were you thinking? Don't you know you could fucking kill yourself doing that?" Gerard yelled, turning the faucet on. He wasn't mad at Frank, he was terrified. He never thought the teen would do this to himself, though it shouldn't be shocking.

"I'm sorry!" Frank began yelling desperately over and over. He was scared that Gerard was mad. Why else would he be yelling? Gerard grabbed a rag and ran it under the water before using it to wash off Frank's wounds.

"I'm locking up everything sharp. You can not be doing this to yourself, Frank." Gerard scolded, gently dabbing at the blood. Frank kept his head down in shame. He couldn't believe he forgot to lock the door. He was embarrassed that Gerard caught him like this. Plus, having Gerard's hands all over his torso wasn't making things easier. Every touch scared him. He expected the next touch to hurt. Gerard was obviously mad, so it was just a matter of time before he moves on to punishing Frank for being stupid.

"I can't get them to stop bleeding, they're really deep Frank. We're going to the hospital." Gerard announced, dropping the rag in the sink before grabbing a bath towel.

"N-No," Frank said, backing away from Gerard.

"Frank, you don't have a choice. You're going," Gerard stated seriously. "Use this to press against the wounds. I'll grab your shoes," Gerard then left Frank crying in the bathroom. Gerard grabbed Frank's shoes and a pair of socks.

"Sit down and I'll help you." Gerard said gently. Frank was still crying as he did as he was told. He sat on the toilet lid while Gerard put his socks and shoes on him like a little kid. "Come on," Gerard ushered gently. Frank didn't move instead he stared at the floor. Gerard grabbed the wet rag out of the sink and crouched down in front of Frank to gently clean up the blood on Frank's body.

"Th-They'll send me back." Frank whispered, almost too quietly for Gerard to catch what he said.

"No, they won't. I won't let them send you back to Rick." Gerard assured, not knowing if he could keep that promise. Most likely, they would take Frank into custody until everything can be sorted out.

"I-I'm not going. I've d-done worse. I-It'll stop," Frank explained quickly, pressing the towel to one of the worst wounds. Gerard sighed and shook his head no.

"Frank, you cut really deep and-" Frank cut him off.

"It'll stop! Please, I c-can't go! It'll stop! Please, i-it'll stop." Frank sobbed, pressing the towel harder to his stomach.

"Frank, stop! This is not something we're debating, you are going." Gerard raised his voice, making Frank cry more. Gerard knew he could easily force the smaller male to go, all he would have to do is grab his arm and drag him downstairs; but he also knew that wouldn't be right. Frank was scared and Gerard didn't want to set them back to how things had been.

Gerard stayed crouched down in front of Frank, watching the teen cry and desperately try to stop the bleeding. Gerard knew forcing Frank to go wouldn't end well. He finally sighed and stood up to leave the bathroom. He pulled out his phone and just as he was about to dial a number, the bathroom door slammed shut and was locked.

"Frank, unlock the door." Gerard called, wiggling the doorknob. He didn't get a response. Frank still had razors in there, he could seriously hurt himself and that scared Gerard. "Frank, I'm not taking you to the hospital, okay? I won't make you go. Just please don't hurt yourself more, okay?" He could hear Frank crying on the other side. He quickly dialed Ray's number and held the phone to his ear.

"Hey, dude," Ray answered.

"Hey, I need another favor," Gerard admitted.

"Need a babysitter?" Ray chuckled.

"No, I need you to go to the store and pick me up a few things. I'll pay you back when you get here." Gerard said quietly. He wasn't sure how Frank would react to Ray coming over again.

"Okay, what do you need?" Ray asked, his tone serious.

"Um, gauze, bandage pads, medical tape, some of that antibacterial stuff, and butterfly strips." Gerard said, trying to think of anything that would help Frank.

"What happened?" Ray asked. There was rustling on the other end of the line, telling Gerard that Ray was getting ready.

"Frank cut himself really bad and he's refusing to go to the hospital. He's locked himself in the bathroom and I can't get him to open the door." Gerard explained, keeping his tone quiet and glancing at the door.

"Oh shit, I'll be there soon." Ray said before hanging up. Gerard stuck his phone back in his pocket and knocked on the bathroom door.

"Frank, I need you to unlock the door." He could faintly hear Frank sniffling on the other side of the door. "Frank, I'm not taking you to the hospital. Please open the door." Frank still didn't unlock it. Gerard sighed and stepped back to stare at the door. He had to be able to get to Frank to help him. He turned and ran downstairs to his junk drawer in the kitchen. He grabbed a screw driver before running back upstairs. He began undoing the screws on the doorknob.

When Gerard finally got the doorknob off, he pushed the door open and gave Frank a sympathetic look. The teen was sitting on the toilet lid with the towel pressed against his wounds while he silently cried. Gerard walked over and sat on the edge of the tub.

"I'm not forcing you to go to the hospital." Gerard told him again, hoping to make peace between the two. Frank didn't look up or even acknowledge Gerard. "I know you're scared, but you have to learn to trust me." Frank just nodded his head a little. They both sat quietly while Frank tended to his own wounds. Gerard wanted to help him but didn't want to upset him again. Plus once Ray got there with the medical supplies, he would have to treat Frank's wounds.

Frank tensed up when the front door opened and someone began coming up the stairs.

"Hey, it's okay, it's just Ray. I asked him to pick me up some stuff." Frank didn't relax, but nodded his head. Ray came into the room, looking down at the doorknob on the floor. Frank used the towel to try to hide his body from the man.

"Um, here's the stuff you needed." Ray said, his eyes on Frank. Gerard thanked him and took the bag, sitting it on the counter. Gerard began taking out the items as Frank watched. "What happened?" Ray asked quietly, leaning closer to Gerard as if that would keep Frank from hearing.

"I already told you," Gerard said, tearing open the packages.

"I mean, what caused it?"

"I'll explain later," Gerard said, grabbing the antibacterial gel and butterfly strips. "I promise I won't hurt you." He told Frank before gently tugging on the towel until Frank let it go. He began putting some of the gel on the worse cuts, careful not to spread it to much so the butterfly strips would still stick. After wiping his fingers off, he grabbed the strips and began putting them on the cuts. The gel was helping to keep some of the cuts from bleeding. After he was done with the worse ones, he moved on to the others.

"Alright, stand up," Gerard said, going back to the counter to grab the gauze. He was happy Ray had grabbed more than one box and that they were the longer rolls. He opened the bandage pads and taped some over the worse cuts. He then had Frank hold his arms out and he wrapped the gauze around his torso. Frank was small, so it wasn't like it was hard. "Ray, will you go to the guest room and grab him another shirt?" Ray didn't say anything before leaving the room. He returned with a black shirt which he handed to Frank.

"C-Can I go?" Frank motioned towards the door, keeping his head down.

"Okay, but please leave your door open." Gerard requested only getting a nod in response. Frank stayed as far away from Ray as he could while slipping out the door.

"What happened?" Ray asked when Frank was back in his room. Gerard sighed as he cleaned up the bathroom.

"I asked him to tell me what happened so we can be sure he's safe. He asked to write it all down, so I gave him a pen and notebook. Then I found him like this. He's scared he'll get sent back to his uncle which is why he refused to go to the hospital." Gerard explained, rinsing the blood out of the rag. "I looked it up last night and they can take Frank away from me obviously and if he doesn't tell them why he ran away, then he'll be sent back. The court may order him and his uncle to go to family therapy, but he'll still be sent back. If he was abused or neglected, which obviously happened to some degree, then I can request to be his guardian until he's eighteen."

"Gee, maybe this kid is too much." Ray said, getting an annoyed look from Gerard.

"I don't need the lecture. Something really bad happened to him, I just know it. I can't let them send him back to that. He already told me that he'll leave again and he might not survive next time. Most runaway kids end up raped, kidnapped, working as drug dealers or prostitutes, or dead." Gerard pointed out. Ray ran a hand over his face.

"So what, he writes everything down and you take him to the police? How do you know they'll even let you be his guardian? You're a twenty-four year old who works at a small town diner. Also, you're gay," Gerard looked at him in confusion.

"And my sexuality is important... why?"

"Hate to break it to ya, buddy, but you're not in the city anymore. You're dealing with a small town, country judge. Gays don't get treated very nicely around here." Ray explained.

"There's a lot I want to say to that right now, but I'll just stick with saying they don't need to know that I'm gay." Gerard said, feeling the anger boiling up inside him. He'd already learned that gays don't fit in too well in small, country towns. He didn't want that to affect Frank's safety. "You're welcome to stick around, but I really need to talk to Frank."

"Hey," Ray stopped Gerard from walking past him. "I'm on your side, okay? I already told you I would help you. I don't agree with those close-minded bastards." Gerard smirked a little.

"Thanks," he said, causing Ray to smile. He walked past Ray and to Frank's room. He pushed the door open the rest of the way to find Frank laying on his stomach with his face buried into O'Malley's side. The cat was purring and kneading at Frank's hair. "Are you okay?" He asked gently, O'Malley was the only one to reply, meowing at Gerard. The red haired man walked the rest of the way in.

"I definitely don't need you lecturing me." Gerard told the cat who meowed again. "I know I shouldn't have yelled at Frank. I was just worried about him." Gerard answered, acting as if the cat really was lecturing him. The cat only meowed again before licking Franks hair. Gerard sat on the bed beside Frank.

"I know I really upset him. I wasn't trying to though. You didn't see all the blood. Scared the hell out of me." The cat didn't reply, instead he laid his head down and closed his eyes. "Frank, I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have yelled, you just really scared me." Frank finally raised his head.

"Y-You were scared?" Frank questioned. His eyes were bloodshot and he looked tired.

"Of course I was. How the hell was I supposed to react to seeing that?" Frank didn't reply. "I know that you probably don't want to tell me what happened, but I need you to. Everything will be okay, I promise." Frank sniffled and stared down before nodding a little.

"A-Are you, um... going to... the a-art room?" Frank mumbled.

"Not right now, I have to do some cleaning. Why?" It took Frank a few moments to reply.

"I don't want... to be alone." Frank admitted.

"Well, I'll be downstairs most of the day. You can come down there, too. You don't have to stay in this room all the time, Frank." Gerard assured him. Frank hesitated before climbing off of the bed, grabbed his pencil and notebook, and walked over to Gerard who smiled at him. They walked downstairs and Frank sat at the dining room table while Gerard began cleaning up.

Frank felt the anxiety building up inside him again. He couldn't let it get the best of him again though. He had to write everything down. Gerard was only going to have so much patience. Eventually he would get mad that Frank wasn't doing what he was told. And Frank wanted to avoid that for as long as he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used the thing of taking the doorknob off in a different story once before and had someone tell me it's not possible. So I want to point out that it is, maybe not will all doorknobs but with some. My family has had to do it several times to get my little sister out of the bathroom, mostly when she was a toddler.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to make a few things clear before you read this chapter. Frank's backstory will be talked about in more detail later in the story. I am in no way trying to water down what happened to Frank.   
> I did a lot of research for this chapter and really hope I got things right. Clinics are all different and will have different procedures they follow.   
> And I had a very weird dream about the police station calling me in the middle of the night to know if I needed emergency help because I kept visiting their website's blog under the topic of rape. O.o I had to explain to them that I was just doing some research, but I didn't want to tell them I was writing a fanfic. xD

It took Frank a few days to finish the note and after giving it to Gerard he hid in his room. He didn't want to see the disgust on Gerard's face when he read it. He didn't want to know what Gerard thought of him. He half expected the man to storm into the room and demand he leave. But he never did. He didn't try to talk to him, he didn't yell at him, and he didn't tell him to get out. Frank wasn't sure if that was good or not.

After Frank gave Gerard the note -which turned into four pages of horror- Gerard went to his art room to read them while Frank went to his room to hide. Gerard hadn't made it past page two. He was too disgusted to even finish the page. That bastard _raped_ Frank. Gerard wanted to hunt the man down and kill him. How could he do that to a kid?

The way Frank doesn't like to be touched, doesn't like to be cornered, how jumpy he is, how terrified he is. Gerard should have seen it earlier. They were all signs he should have noticed. But now the question is, what is he supposed to do now? It made sense that Frank is scared, but that man can't get away with what he's done to Frank. Does he talk to Frank about it? He had never dealt with this type of thing before and he definitely didn't want to make things worse.

He grabbed his laptop and began looking up ways he could help Frank. The first website he clicked on went through the different stages of recovery. The very first thing on the list was to go to the hospital to be tested for STDs and STIs. Gerard read through the sections even though he knew he would never get Frank to a hospital to be tested. Maybe one day.

The next section was on rebuilding a sense of safety and trust. It said to do what you can to help them regain control of their life, help them feel safe, and help them rebuild their trust for others. It suggested that you place familiar things in their life and try to act as normal around them as you can, but you have to learn their new boundaries.

Then it went on to advise against trying to take charge when they seem to be hesitant to make decisions themselves. It suggested that it was best to gently encourage them to take certain steps, but not to push them or try to force them. Basically the best thing was to stay by their side and respect their decisions because it helps them have a sense of control (something they'll feel was taken from them).

One thing that caught Gerard's attention was on finding an outlet. You could encourage the victim to find something to help them cope, maybe something they already enjoy or something new they could try. Gerard made a mental note of that. Maybe he could find something for him and Frank to do together so Frank can learn to cope -without hurting himself- and they could work on rebuilding Frank's trust.

Gerard did some more research on how to talk to a rape victim. He then looked up different crisis centers and counselors in the area. He wrote down all of the ones that looked the best before shutting his laptop. He realized he probably should finish reading what Frank had written before confronting him about it. He sat down on the couch and started reading again. It got worse as he kept reading. The breaking point for Frank was when his uncle allowed his friends to use Frank for their own pleasure. It made Gerard sick.

His heart was racing as he made his way to Frank's room. He knocked softly on the door before cracking it open. He poked his head in and found Frank hiding under his blankets. He looked around for O'Malley before deciding Frank probably had the cat under the blankets too. He walked in and quietly shut the door before going to the bed. He sat down on the edge and tried to figure out the best way to go about this.

"Frank, I'm so sorry for what happened." Gerard said, his voice cracking slightly. Frank stayed completely still under the covers. The only movement was the small lump that Gerard figured was O'Malley. "Is there anything I can do for you? Do you want to talk about it?" Gerard kept his tone as gentle as he could. The last thing he wanted to do was scare Frank or make things worse.

Gerard sat quietly for a while to allow Frank to think it over. He wanted to show Frank that he didn't blame him for what happened. He also wanted Frank to know he was here for him. If he needed to talk, he could. It took a little while but Frank finally removed the covers from over his head. O'Malley climbed out from under the covers and jumped off of the bed. Frank's eyes were red and puffy, telling Gerard he had been crying.

"I'm sorry," Frank whispered, not looking at Gerard.

"Why are you sorry?" Gerard asked in confusion.

"I-It was my fault." Frank sounded so broken and it hurt to see him like that.

"No, Frank, it was _not_ your fault. Nothing that he did to you was your fault." Gerard said, getting a confused look from Frank before he turned away again, seeming unconvinced. "Hey, no matter what he told you, it wasn't true. You didn't deserve it and it wasn't your fault." Gerard said, trying to offer some kind of comfort. It didn't seem to help though since Frank buried himself back under the covers before breaking down. Gerard sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Did you ever, um.... Go to the hospital?" Gerard asked.

"No," he barely heard Frank say.

"I really think you should." Gerard said slowly. He didn't want to upset Frank but they had to be sure Frank didn't catch anything from those men.

"Why?" He heard after a long silence. Gerard bit his lip and fidgeted around again. How was he supposed to put this? He couldn't just tell Frank he was worried he had an STD or STI, that would make him feel worse. And what if Frank does have one? That will be devastating to the teen.

"I just think it would be a good idea." Gerard said, trying to avoid actually saying the reason. Frank stayed silent and still for a long time, making Gerard think he wasn't going to get a reply from the teen.

"I'm not h-hurt." He finally heard, causing him to sigh again. Gerard rubbed his hands together a little, trying to think of the best way to say this.

"Sometimes when this happens, you can.... _catch_ things from your attacker. And since you had more than one-" Frank cut Gerard off by sitting up fast, pushing the covers off of his head.

"I'm not disgusting!" Frank yelled, tears building in his eyes.

"I never said you were." Gerard said gently. "You don't know what those men could have." Gerard pointed out, trying to keep from upsetting Frank more.

"It was just Rick," Frank whispered.

"But in your note you said-" Frank cut him off again.

"They didn't...." Frank couldn't say it.

"They didn't.... go all the way?" Gerard filled in and Frank nodded. "Did they, um, y-you know," Gerard stumbled over his words, his face heating up a little.

"Did they... what?" Frank asked, figuring he knew where this was going but wanting to be sure. He didn't want to tell Gerard more than what was necessary. Gerard sighed again, trying to force himself to say it.

"Did they... or-orgasm o-on you. Like, um, in your mouth or d-down there?" Gerard asked, gesturing to his own lower body as he said it. His face was bright red now. It felt wrong to be asking a rape victim about this. Plus he was pretty sure this wasn't appropriate to talk to a minor about.

"Yes," he barely heard Frank's reply. His head snapped up when Frank said it though. Frank broke down again, burying himself tightly under the covers again. Gerard felt bad for asking about it, but he had to know everything he could. As he listened to Frank cry, he started thinking about those websites that said not to trigger the victim. He started wondering how much of this was for Frank's well being and how much was just to save his own ass when the police came.

"Um, you can still catch... things from them that way, too." Gerard said before he really thought about it. He was positive he was doing more harm than good now. "I'm sorry," Gerard said before standing up and leaving the room. By the time his feet hit the floor at the bottom of the stairs, he had tears of anger running down his face. How could he be so stupid? He was trying to _help _not make things worse. And accusing Frank of having a disease or infection definitely made things worse.__

He paced around the house, wracking his brain for anything he could do to make it better. Gerard grabbed his phone and went outside to sit on the porch. It was cold out and he didn't have a jacket, but he didn't really care. He began searching on his phone for what he was supposed to do now. He didn't really find much that helped though. Every site was just about what not to say to a victim. That didn't help because Gerard had already said the wrong thing. None of the sites explained what to do after you fuck up.

Frank stayed under his blankets until he managed to calm himself down. Gerard thinks he's gross. He wants Frank tested. He was positive Rick didn't have anything -or at least he hoped he didn't- and those other men only touched him and rubbed against him. Except the one who kept putting himself in Frank's mouth, but Rick didn't like him doing that and made him stop. He couldn't actually catch something from them doing that, could he? And what if the tests come back positive for something? Would that be the end of Gerard's generosity?

Frank was also worried that Gerard was already mad at him for refusing to be tested. What if Gerard decided to kick him out if he wasn't going to accept his help? He didn't want to be examined and stuck with needles though. But at the same time, he didn't want to be thrown out either. He may not trust Gerard fully yet, but having a warm place to sleep and food to eat was better than starving in that cold barn.

It took Frank an hour to make up his mind. He finally crawled out of the bed, grabbed his board and marker, and made his way downstairs on shaky legs. He searched the house but couldn't find Gerard. He was about to give up when he saw him through the living room window on the porch swing. The door creaking gave him away and Gerard turned to look at him. The man forced a small smile that Frank couldn't return. He was too nervous about what he had to say.

Gerard scooted to one side of the swing to allow Frank to sit next to him. After he sat down, Frank began writing on his board. He finally handed the board to Gerard who read over what Frank had written.

 **"If you really want me to get tested, I will. But I don't want to talk to them about what happened to me and no police either."** Gerard looked over at Frank and back down at the board.

"We'll have to tell them what happened. But it's completely up to you if you want to press charges or not." Gerard said, reciting what he had read on one of those sites. He wasn't sure if it was the same for a minor. Especially since he's not Frank's guardian or even a family member. Frank took the board back and began writing again.

 **"Will this help keep me here?"** Gerard was confused by that.

"I-I honestly don't know. M-Maybe?" He replied, not sure how to really respond. Frank only nodded in response. "Um, do you want to go now?" Frank nodded again. He figured it was best to get it over with before he could change his mind.

\-----------------------------------

Frank felt like he was going to be sick. The nurse at the hospital recommended they go to a local clinic since they could give him the results quickly. Gerard drove him to the clinic, helped him fill out the paperwork, and sat with him in the little waiting room. About halfway through the paperwork he changed his mind. He didn't want to do this anymore. Gerard had quietly talked to him, trying to convince him it would be okay and it would be over quickly.

Others waiting in the room with them either gave him odd looks or sympathetic ones which didn't help. He felt they were judging him. Either they were thinking this was all his fault and he had no reason to be crying; or they felt bad for him having to suffer the consequences of his actions. Either way, they thought it was his fault.

"Frank Iero?" A nurse asked, giving him a kind smile when Gerard motioned to him. Frank was frozen in his seat. He couldn't go back there.

"W-Will you come with me?" Frank asked, looking over to Gerard who was shocked. Gerard nodded his head.

"Yeah, of course," he said, standing up from his seat. He gently pulled Frank up and guided him to the door the nurse was standing in. She gave him a sympathetic smile as she led them both back and into a room. She had Frank sit down on the little bed in the room before she sat in the chair near him. Gerard sat on the bed next to Frank who was shaking worse than before.

"Alright, sweetie, why don't you tell me why you're here." The nurse asked, tucking some black hair behind her ear. She was a short woman with dark skin, black hair, brown eyes, and was slightly overweight. She had a kind face and voice though.

"I-I want to get tested." Frank said, feeling stupid afterwards. Of course that's why he's here. The nurse didn't laugh at him though. She seemed to understand his nervousness.

"Would you like him to answer for you?" She asked, motioning toward Gerard. Frank looked over at him then back at the nurse before nodding. He kept his eyes on his lap, fighting back tears. This was humiliating.

"He, um, he was... raped." Gerard told her, keeping his tone down as if others could hear them. The nurse looked at Frank with sad eyes even though he couldn't see it.

"Okay, do you want to do a full test?" She asked and Frank only nodded. "Alright, honey, I'm gonna have you put a gown on so I can examine you." Frank's head shot up, his eyes wide.

"W-What?" He asked, his heart rate speeding up. He thought they would just ask questions and take a blood test or something.

"It'll be okay. I just want to make sure there are no signs of certain STDs or STIs. Also, if there is any damage, I'll need you to go to the hospital." She explained, Frank couldn't stop the tears. He felt pathetic for crying so much, but he couldn't help it. This time he was crying from humiliation. He didn't want anyone to see his body. It was disgusting.

"Um, do you want me to step outside?" Gerard asked, looking at Frank who nodded his head yes. Gerard nodded a little before getting up. "Can I come back in after you're done?"

"Yes, of course, just wait outside the door and I'll get you when we're all done." The nurse said kindly. Gerard only nodded and gave Frank what he hoped was a reassuring smile before exiting the room. He leaned against the wall by the door and waited.

"Alright, sweetie, go ahead and put this on." The nurse said, handing Frank a blue hospital gown with white dots all over it. She turned away to the table in the corner, giving Frank a little privacy. Frank was still crying as he removed his clothes with shaky hands. As he changed, the nurse got everything ready that she would need. He sat back down on the bed and waited. He tried to control his crying.

"Alright, go ahead and lay down." She said gently. Frank did as he was told, moving back so he could lay on the bed. He kept his eyes squeezed shut as she examined him. He tried his hardest not to break down. He kept reminding himself that she was a nurse, that she wasn't going to hurt him, that this was necessary.

It felt like it took forever for her to finish and the second she said he could sit up, he did. He didn't look up at her, he was too embarrassed to look at her.

"You don't have any signs of anything, but that doesn't necessarily mean you don't have anything. Most people never have any symptoms. I took a swab and I would also like to take a blood test." She told him, writing something down on the clipboard she had. "Have you had a sore throat lately?" Frank shook his head no and she wrote it down.

"Have you had any other sexual partners? This includes people you've given or received oral sex from." He shook his head no again before nodding yes. "What do you mean?" She asked, he didn't want to tell her about the other men.

"Um, one.... oral," was all he said. He hoped she didn't ask for anymore information about that. She didn't, she just wrote it down.

"Sexual orientation?"

"Gay," he replied.

"Have you ever injected drugs? If so, have you shared needles?" He shook his head no. "Have you ever gotten a tattoo from an unlicensed artist?" He shook his head no. "Have you ever gotten piercings from an unlicensed piercer?" He shook his head no again.

"Alright, I'll go ahead and let you get changed then your friend can come back in." She said, smiling kindly at him. "I'll be back in a moment to take you to a different room where they'll draw your blood." She then left the room. Frank was shaking as he got re-dressed. He sat back on the bed and waited. After a few minutes, there was a knock on the door.

"C-Come in," he said, though he wasn't sure they heard him. After a few moments, the door opened and Gerard poked his head in. He gave Frank a small smile before coming in and shutting the door.

"How are you doing?" Gerard asked, sitting in the chair the nurse had been sitting in earlier. Frank took a shaky breath but didn't answer. They sat in silence, the only noise was the ticking of the wall clock behind Frank. The nurse came back and had them follow her through the hallways. She had Frank sit in a chair that looked like a big, leather recliner.

"Alright, Nikki will be with you in a few minutes." She said before leaving again. Gerard leaned against the wall near Frank as they waited. After a while a skinny girl with red hair pulled into a ponytail walked in. She smiled at them and introduced herself as Nikki.

"Alright, have you ever had blood drawn before?" She asked and Frank shook his head no. "Okay, do needles make you queasy?" He shook his head no again. She got everything she needed before she started working on drawing Frank's blood. Gerard felt a bit lightheaded and had to look away. He hated needles and couldn't handle watching someone get stuck with one. After the nurse announced that she was done, Gerard looked back over.

\--------------------------------

Frank didn't say a single word the whole ride home. He didn't even look at Gerard. The older man was worried Frank was upset with him. He did kind of pressure Frank into getting tested, but he hoped this would help ease Frank's mind a little. At least the worst part was over, right?

When they got to the house, Frank went straight to his room and got under the covers. He wasn't mad at Gerard, he was humiliated and scared. What if the tests come back positive for something? Or more than one thing? What if he has some life threatening, incurable disease? Then again, he wanted to end his own life but never could. A disease would do the job for him. Of course, it will be extremely painful and slow. A horrible way to die really.

Gerard allowed Frank to have his time alone. He wanted to give Frank his space. He would check on him in a bit, but for now he wanted to give him time collect himself. He decided to clean some more before dinner. Normally, he cleaned the house at least once a week, just to keep it looking nice and to prove his parents wrong about him not being about to take care of himself or a house.

As he cleaned, his mind stayed on Frank. He really didn't mean to upset him, but this was a necessary step he had to take. If Frank does have something and it stays untreated, it will only get worse and could end up killing him. He kept trying to convince himself the tests were the right thing, but it was hard. Frank looked so upset and hurt by what happened today. Whether that was directed at Gerard or not, the man didn't know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want everyone reading to know that if they have been a victim of rape or sexual assault, then please do NOT feel ashamed! If you need help, please reach out to someone you trust and go from there. No matter what, it was NOT your fault. It doesn't matter if you were drunk or high, what you were wearing, or who did it, IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT.   
> U.S. National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE   
> (For those not in the U.S. please visit this sight for help) https://www.rainn.org/get-help/sexual-assault-and-rape-international-resources  
> National and International suicide prevention hotlines:  
> http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html  
> http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/  
> Also, if you want free and anonymous counseling, you can visit The Hopeline. You can either talk on the phone with someone, chat online, or visit their blog. You can choose to remain anonymous, it is confidential and free. They will ask for your zip code, but that's just so they can help you find counseling/crisis centers in your area. (http://www.thehopeline.com/)  
> And if you need a friend, I'm here for you. I am NOT a professional and I can't help you like one can. But I can offer a listening ear and encouragement to seek professional help. You can reach me on:  
> Tumblr: http://thedeadmilitia.tumblr.com/  
> Instagram: @monster_chick94  
> Twitter: @TheDeadMilitia


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not really pleased with this chapter. :\

It took two days for Frank's test results to come back. Gerard didn't think it would be that fast, but the nurse at the hospital did say the clinic would get them faster than a hospital. Gerard expected the clinic to just call and tell Frank the results over the phone, but the guy on the other end requested Frank come in to talk about his results. Frank hadn't stopped crying since the phone call and Gerard was doing everything he could to comfort Frank.

After getting ready, they made their way to the clinic. Once there, Gerard had to tell the woman at the front desk why they were there. Frank was shaking and trying to control his crying as he sat in one of the waiting room chairs. Gerard sat down next to him. He felt horrible for Frank and wished there was something he could do to help. After a little debating, Gerard finally reached out and took Frank's hand. Frank's first reaction was to pull away but Gerard kept a hold of his hand, not tight enough to hurt or scare him though. Frank stared at him with wide eyes before accepting the touch and gripping on to Gerard's hand in return.

"Frank Iero?" A nurse said a few minutes later. Gerard had to basically drag Frank back to the room the nurse took them to. He was shaking so much he could barely move. After a few minutes of Gerard trying to comfort Frank, the same woman who did Frank's examination came into the room. She gave him a sympathetic smile which didn't help calm Frank's nerves.

"Alright, honey," she said, sitting down in a chair. "We got the results for your tests and you have Chlamydia." She kept her tone gentle and caring. It didn't help Frank though. His heart stopped the second she said it. Gerard looked at Frank with slight shock.

"W-What?" Was all Frank managed to say.

"Chlamydia is a bacterial infection and it is completely treatable. I'm going to prescribe you some antibiotics and normally it takes about two weeks for the infection to clear up. I still want you to finish the antibiotics though. Some people think they can stop after two weeks, but you need to continue to be sure the infection is gone Also, three months after you finish the antibiotics I would like you to come back to be re-tested just to be positive it is gone. Okay?" She kept her tone soft like she was talking to a frightened child. Which Gerard figured Frank kind of was a frightened child.

"And you're advised to get tested to." She addressed Gerard whose eyes widened. She turned her attention back to Frank. "Along with anyone else you've had sexual contact with."

"I-I'm not his... partner. We're just friends," Gerard said, noticing Frank's face was bright red. He was sure his own cheeks were red too.

"Oh, my mistake, I just assumed," she said with a small smile.

\----------------------------

Frank clung to Gerard as they walked around the store while waiting for Frank's prescription to be filled. In Frank's mind, everyone knew why he was in the drug store. Everyone knew he was dirty. Everyone was judging him. Especially the workers at the pharmacy, they were definitely judging him.

He had been hesitant to touch Gerard at first. He was afraid that Gerard was mad at him for being gross. He got the courage to cling to Gerard after the man had taken his hand and given him a kind smile. Frank was still worried about how Gerard sees him now, but he was happy to accept the comfort. He knew it would probably be taken away from him when they got back to the house.

After they were sure it had been long enough, they went back to the pharmacy to get the prescription. Frank felt bad that Gerard had to pay for the prescription. He had been dropped from his health insurance after moving in with his uncle and the man refused to pay for it.

"Do we need anything else?" Gerard asked as they made their way to the exit. Frank only shrugged in response. "Alright," was all Gerard said. Frank was squirming around in his seat on the way home.

"I-I'll pay you back.... somehow," Frank said. Gerard furrowed his brow, glancing over at the teen.

"For what?" He asked, glancing over a couple of times. Frank kept his gaze down at his lap.

"Th-The prescription," Frank said, motioning to the white bag on the dashboard.

"Don't worry about it," Gerard said with a smile. He didn't want Frank to feel that he owed him anything. A sixteen year old shouldn't be going through this in the first place, so the least Gerard could do is pay the thirty-eight dollars to help Frank.

"Um, I-I had some... stuff i-in the barn. Um... C-Could we go get it?" Frank asked, worried of what Gerard's answer would be. He didn't want to ask Gerard for anything. "I mean, I-I can go by myself." Frank kept his eyes on his lap.

"Oh, yeah, of course," Gerard replied. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?" Frank only shrugged.

"We can go later if you want." He offered, only getting a shrug in response.

\---------------------

Gerard allowed Frank to have his alone time when they got home. He seemed upset and went straight to his room when they got home. Gerard had taken him some water and his pills so he could start taking them, then he only went to check on him occasionally.

Gerard made sure to go through the house and lock up anything sharp. He couldn't really lock everything up, so instead he just put most of it in a box and stuck it in the back of his closet. All of the kitchen knives fit inside a wooden box he had that he could put a pad lock on. After locking the box, he stuck it under the sink.

After he was done, he ended up leaning against the kitchen counter. His mind went through everything that happened, everything he read in the note from Frank, everything Ray and Mikey had been telling him. Then he began wondering if this was all worth it. He shook his head, trying to erase the thought. Frank needed him. He couldn't just abandon him.

He snatched his keys from the counter and went up the stairs. He pushed Frank's door open and saw him sitting up with a book in his hands.

"Hey, I'm gonna go get your stuff, okay? Do you want to go with me?" Frank only shook his head no. "Alright, I'll be right back," Gerard told him before leaving the room again. He began walking towards the stairs when the bedroom door opened again.

"I-It's in a trunk upstairs," Frank told him.

"Oh, okay," Gerard gave him a smile. They stood there for a moment, causing Frank to feel awkward. The teen finally slipped back into the bedroom and Gerard went downstairs and out the door.

\--------------------

Once Gerard was gone, Frank left his room again. He went to the bathroom and looked through everything he could find. He then went to the kitchen and began looking through it. He found a wooden box under the sink, but it had a pad lock on it and he figured Gerard had the key if that was where he put the knives. He opened the silverware drawer to find that Gerard had even taken all of the butter knives out. With a loud groan, he slammed the drawer shut. He figured he could hurt himself with a fork, but it would take a lot more effort and wouldn't be as satisfying.

Frank began going through every drawer and cabinet in the kitchen. There wasn't even anything sharp in the junk drawer. He gave up and began going back upstairs. When he reached the top of the stairs, he stopped to stare at Gerard's bedroom door. It was possible that he hid everything somewhere in there. He hesitated with his hand on the doorknob. Rick would have been pissed if he went through his room, he was sure Gerard would be the same way.

Frank shook his head and went back to his own room. He fought back the tears that threatened to fall. He was so frustrated and scared. He has an STI, nobody is going to want him after this. Gerard was just taking pity on him. He would eventually demand that he leave. He just knew it. He began scratching at his arms harshly. He wanted to hurt physically to match what he was feeling emotionally.

After scratching enough to draw blood and make his arm sting, he crawled back under the covers, pulling them up over his head. The only hope he had was that Gerard wouldn't look through his things and he could hide his razor somewhere in the room. The idea of Gerard taking his razor made him want to cry more and he wasn't sure why. He felt so frustrated and he couldn't figure out why. He had a tight feeling in his chest and his stomach was churning. He was just irritated and he couldn't place why.

He didn't move when he heard Gerard come back. He knew the man would come to his room. He was slightly surprised to hear dragging and thumping along with Gerard's footsteps. Then the door opened and the dragging sound became louder. He removed the covers from his head to look over. Gerard had brought the whole trunk back and that noise must have been him dragging it up the stairs.

"I would have helped you," Frank said quietly, feeling guilty for making Gerard bring the whole thing up the stairs. Gerard just shrugged.

"It's really not heavy, it's just too big to carry." Gerard stood there like he expected Frank to say or do something. Frank wasn't sure what to do though. Did Gerard go through the trunk? Was he getting ready to yell at him for the razor? Was he waiting for Frank to open the trunk so he could see what was inside? Gerard gave him a small smile before leaving the room.

After Gerard was back downstairs, Frank got up and opened the trunk. He began pulling out his items, placing them on the floor around him. After the trunk was empty, there was one thing he hadn't found. Did he forget to put it back after using it last? Maybe he could convince Gerard to let him go back to the barn alone? There was no way he would be allowed to have it if Gerard knew why he was going back.

After putting everything away, being sure to place the picture of his mom on the nightstand, he went downstairs. He scolded himself in his head for shaking so much. He was going to give it away. Gerard was going to know why he wanted to go back and he was going to get mad. This was a bad idea. Frank could just sneak out in the middle of the night and go get it. Gerard would never have to know. Of course if Gerard finds out he snuck out he would be mad. There was no way to do this without making Gerard mad. Frank was about to turn around and go back to his room. He should just forget the razor. But Gerard caused him to stop.

"Get everything unpacked?" He asked from where he was sitting on the couch scrolling through his phone. Frank only nodded. He debated asking if he could go back to the barn. The worse Gerard would do it say no, right? He finally took a deep breath and tried to speak. He choked on his words though, getting Gerard's attention again. He cleared his throat and looked to the floor. This was a bad idea. He couldn't ask to leave the house alone. Gerard wouldn't like that.

"Something wrong?" Gerard asked, sounding concerned. Frank shook his head no, keeping his eyes on the wooden floor. "Yes, there is. What's wrong?" Gerard pushed, staring right at Frank.

"S-Something was missing." Frank whispered, shaking as he waited to be yelled at to get over it.

"What was it?" Gerard asked, sounding suspicious. Frank knew right away that Gerard knew what was missing. His tone was daring Frank to ask for it back. He knew Gerard was mad. He finally shook his head, shrinking away from the older man more.

"I-It's not im-important." Frank whispered, motioning toward the stairs but not being able to tell Gerard he was going back to his room. He turned toward the stairs, but Gerard stopped him.

"Was it your razor?" Frank couldn't understand Gerard's tone. He didn't sound mad but he also didn't sound gentle. That was scary to Frank because Rick used to do that. He would show no emotion while talking and then he would end up beating Frank. It was terrifying to the teen.

"N-No," Frank whispered, scolding himself. Gerard was going to know he was lying. Rick always knew when he lied and he got it worse for lying. He squeezed his eyes shut when he heard Gerard stand up.

"Hey," Gerard's tone was soft now. "Turn around," he commanded and Frank listened. He had already lied, he wasn't getting into more trouble for being disobedient.

"I'm not mad," Gerard assured, keeping his voice as soft and gentle as he could. "I went through the trunk at the barn just to be sure you didn't have anything like that. I found the razor and I'm not giving it back to you. You can't do that to yourself, Frank. Especially not with that razor. It's old and starting to rust and it's been in that trunk for a while. You can give yourself infections and even diseases from this." Gerard explained, trying his hardest not to upset Frank.

"Are you okay?" Gerard asked when he didn't get a reply from Frank. The teen only nodded, still not looking up at him. "I'm just worried about you, okay? I don't want you to accidentally kill yourself or give yourself some kind of ailment from this. I know you've been through a lot, but there is never anything worth hurting yourself over." Gerard said, Frank only nodded again.

"C-Can I-" Frank cut himself off, gesturing toward the stairs.

"Sure," Gerard said, watching as Frank hurried up the stairs the second the word was out. He sighed and ran a hand through his red hair. He was trying to help not upset Frank. He wasn't scolded him he was trying to show him compassion. But he heard the small sniffle and saw the tears starting slide from Frank's eyes as he turned away. He wanted Frank to understand that he was better than that. He doesn't need to hurt himself, no matter what happened. It's not worth it because it won't make anything better. But in Frank's mind, he was being scolded and was now upset.

Gerard made his way up to Frank's room. He couldn't let Frank think he was mad. He had to explain himself to the teen. He knocked on the door before opening it. Frank was laying face down on his bed and from his heavy breathing it was obvious he was crying but trying to control it. That felt like a stab in Gerard's heart. He didn't mean to make Frank cry. He walked over and sat on the bed beside him. He reached out and gently began rubbing his back.

"I'm not mad, Frank, I swear. I just don't want something bad to happen to you. I wasn't trying to upset you, okay? I'm sorry that I did." Gerard said, not knowing how to make this better. He sat there and gently rubbed Frank's back, hoping to comfort him. After ten minutes of Frank basically ignoring him, he moved to lay beside him. He wanted to show Frank that he wasn't a threat, that he cared for him. He gently moved closer, hoping not to scare Frank. He felt Frank tense up when he got closer and placed a hand on the teen's back. He had to show him he wasn't going to hurt him. 

After a while of laying with Frank in the awkward position, the teen finally turned on his side, facing Gerard. The older man didn't move closer, he kept enough space between them so their bodies weren't touching. He moved his hands to hold on to Frank's sides, keeping his grip very loose in case Frank wanted to pull away. The last thing he wanted was to make the teen feel trapped. He waited to see what Frank would do. He wouldn't fight no matter what Frank chose. Whether that was to move closer or move away.

It seemed to take Frank a few minutes to decide what he wanted. He finally began slowly wiggling away from Gerard who removed his hands from the boys small frame. Once Frank was as far away from Gerard as the bed would allow, he just stared at the man. His eyes showed confusion and fear. Gerard kept a caring expression, giving Frank a small smile. He didn't want Frank to fear him.

Neither one said anything as they laid there. After a while, Frank calmed down and seemed to relax a little. That made Gerard happy because he wondered if Frank realized he wasn't going to hurt him.

Frank was still wary of Gerard. He didn't know what the older man wanted, but he was starting to hope that maybe he wasn't going to hurt him. The man was bigger than he was, if he really wanted to, he could pin Frank down, they were both aware of this. But he didn't. He didn't even tighten his grip when he pulled away. He just let him go. He didn't get mad, didn't demand he lay still, he just removed his hands and let him move away. Gerard wasn't as aggressive as Rick, but that didn't mean he didn't want the same thing. Frank wasn't about to let his guard fall just because the man was being gentle. Not every rape is aggressive and rough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Frankie, when will you learn to trust Gerard?


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm uploading this from my phone, so hopefully there aren't too many mistakes. 
> 
> For anyone whose curious, my family got an extra 30 days, but our 30 days ends next Sunday. We've already started moving though and plan to be out of here in the next few days.   
> This past Wednesday, I was brushing my dog's fur when she got spooked and turned to run to the house. In doing so, she ran into my knee and dislocated the kneecap. I fell down and somehow managed to bend my knee while doing so which, according to the ER doctor, was why I was in excruciating pain. I spent 4 or 5 hours in the ER (most of them with nothing for pain. Just something to relax my muscles) and have been on crutches since. So I haven't been any help in packing and moving. My dog, China, felt really bad though. She came back to me after I started yelling for my mom and kept nuzzling against me. And now she keeps laying at my feet and nuzzling the foot on my injured leg. The first time she saw me after I got home from the hospital she wanted in my room and was pouting the whole time.

Gerard watched as Frank flipped through the TV channels, pausing on each one and looking over at Gerard for approval. He was so terrified to make even the smallest decision himself. He constantly wanted to make sure Gerard didn't seem interested in what was on that channel before turning to the next.

Gerard had just gotten home from work, cleaned up a little, and changed clothes before sitting down with Frank who had already been flipping through the channels. He seemed to tense up and become uneasy as soon as Gerard got home. The older man worried that he was making Frank feel trapped. Frank had barely left the house since arriving there and when he did, Gerard was always right beside him. Frank had been held hostage by his uncle, Gerard didn't want to be seen the same way. 

"Hey, how about you go with me to take pictures?" Gerard offered.

"What are you taking pictures of?" Frank asked, keeping his voice quiet. Gerard had began to wonder if Frank was naturally this quiet. He figured the more likely thing was that Rick had beaten Frank into the way he is now. 

"Well, today I figured I would just walk around and see what catches my eye. But Sunday afternoon I'm taking pictures for the local rescue center. You can go with me, if you want." 

"The rescue center?" Frank asked and Gerard nodded.

"Yeah, they need some new pictures of the animals they have so they can update their website." Gerard explained, smiling a little. "I'm gonna go get my stuff ready and we can head out, alright?" Frank only nodded. Gerard ran upstairs to his art room where he kept all his stuff. He grabbed his camera bag and began putting the things he would need in it. He then grabbed one of his old cameras before heading back downstairs.

Frank went to his room and slipped on his shoes and the jacket Gerard had bought him before quietly making his way back downstairs. Gerard was standing in the living room with a black bag over his shoulder and a camera in his hands. He was messing with the settings on the camera so Frank stood back. He didn't want to disturb Gerard while he was focusing. Gerard finally turns and smiled at Frank before holding out the camera.

"This is one of my old cameras but it's a good one. You can use it to take pictures of whatever catches your eye. Have you ever used one of these?" Frank shook his head no. "Okay, well, this one controls the shutter speed which means it controls how much light gets in. This one controls the aperture which is the depth of field, like how much area of the photo is in focus. These others are fast ways to control certain settings, like wide areas, small things or up close, motion, that kind of stuff.

"This has manual focus and auto focus. Auto focus is good for when you're learning, but it doesn't always produce the sharpest pictures and honestly, I found it more frustrating than manual. With manual, you move this little piece on the end of the lens to focus. Okay?" Gerard explained, moving the slim rim around the end of the lens. Frank stared at the camera for a moment before nodding.

"If you have questions while we're out, just ask. It's probably easier to learn while actually using it." Gerard said, shutting the camera off and passing it to Frank with a smile.

"Thank you," Frank said, carefully taking the camera. He was afraid that he would end up breaking the camera and be punished.

"No problem," Gerard smiled. "Maybe later we can go to the restaurant for dinner. We have vegan meals, too." Frank only gave a small smile. He really didn't want to go anywhere, but he wouldn't dare say that.

\--------------------

The two had wandered around for a few hours before Gerard decided it was time for dinner. They were now seated at a corner table near a window. Frank was sitting in the corner, facing the rest of the restaurant while Gerard sat with his back to the rest of the room. Gerard hadn't expected the restaurant to be busy and was feeling guilty for bringing Frank in. The younger boy kept looking around the room and he hadn't stopped fidgeting in his seat since they got here.

"Mind if I see the pictures you've taken? You can look through mine, too." Gerard said, reaching down to pull out his camera and pass it to Frank. The teen removed the camera from his neck before passing it to Gerard who turned it on. Frank turned on the camera Gerard had been using and began looking through the pictures. They were all incredible and weren't things Frank would have taken pictures of. Gerard definitely saw more than just objects and plants when he looked around.

"These are really good for someone whose never used a camera." Gerard commented, looking through the pictures Frank had taken. The teen only shrugged, not knowing how to respond.

"Hey, sorry about the wait." A black haired girl apologized, placing two menus on the table.

"Kady, I work here, I completely understand." Gerard chuckled.

"Right, what can I get you to drink?" She asked, taking out her order book.

"Pepsi for me." Gerard answered, looking to Frank now.

"Oh, u-um, s-same," Frank basically whispered. Kady stared at him for a moment before looking to Gerard.

"He wants Pepsi, too." Gerard clarified. She only nodded once before writing it down and walking away. Gerard picked up his menu and began looking it over even though he knew what was on it. He was trying to encourage Frank to do the same. He didn't want Frank feeling out of place or shy.

"What looks good to you?" Gerard asked, figuring he would order for Frank so the other male wasn't put on the spot again.

"Um, I-I don't-" Frank cut himself off, only shaking his head to finish what he was trying to say. He hated that he couldn't talk right. After years of being hurt just for existing, you learned not to speak. So having someone wanting him to speak was hard on him.

"Well, the vegan creamy broccoli pasta is amazing. So is the vegan pizza bake. It's basically pizza lasagna." Gerard suggested, trying to get Frank to voice what he wanted.

"U-Um, the pizza one sounds good." Frank confessed, earning a smile from Gerard.

"Is that what you want?" Gerard asked, causing Frank to shrug.

"I-If that's okay," he said, glancing up at Gerard who chuckled.

"Of course it is." He told him as Kady came back with their drinks.

"Are you guys ready to order?" She asked and Gerard nodded.

"He wants the vegan pizza bake and I want the Garden Grill with fries." Gerard said, picking up the menus. After Kady was done writing it down, she took the menus and went to put their order in.

"What did you get?" Frank asked, glancing up briefly. 

"Oh, it's a grilled cheese with tomato and pesto sauce. Itnis addictive. I practically lived on them when my boss first added them to the menu." Gerard chuckled, happy to see a small grin on Frank's face, too. Gerard tried to talk as they waited for their food. Frank wasn't really responding like normal, so it made it harder to keep a conversation going. He finally resolved to random sentences while Frank played with the empty paper wrapper from his straw.

"Maybe some time I can take you to New York City to meet my brother. I've been trying to get him to come here to visit, but he, um... What's wrong?" Gerard asked when he saw the look of horror on Frank's face. The teen bowed his head and began shaking. He moved around like he was trying to hide himself. Gerard got a sick feeling in his stomach as he turned around to scan the restaurant. It wasn't like he knew what any of Frank's attackers looked like, but he pictured some big, greasy, gross pervert whose appearance just screams pedophile. He didn't didn't see anyone that fit that description though. Only a middle aged, blond man who had been staring at them but looked away the second he met Gerard's eyes.

"Frank what's wrong?" Gerard asked, keeping his tone soft and low, reaching out to gently touch Frank who flinched and pulled away. "Is there someone here who scares you?" He knew the answer but was trying to get information from the teen. The younger man only nodded, his breathing irregular and his shaking had gotten worse.

"It's okay, Frank. I won't let anyone hurt you, I promise. Gerard said softly, trying to think of what they could do to get out of here unnoticed. He bit his lip before sitting up straight to take off his hoodie. He passed it over to Frank who only glanced up briefly. "Put this on and put the hood up. We're leaving, okay?" Frank nodded and took the hoodie. He slipped it on and put the hood up like he had been told. Gerard motioned for Frank to follow him before standing up.

"Where are you going?" Kady asked as they headed for the kitchen. Gerard glanced to Frank who was clinging to his side and still shaking.

"I'll explain later, okay?" Gerard said, gently putting a hand on Frank's back to lead him towards the kitchen.

"Hey," he heard a guy yell. He ignored it, his mission was to get Frank to safety. "Hey, stop!" He felt a hand grab his arm and he instantly jerked it away. He turned to see the blond man. He was a well dressed man who Gerard had seen a few times in the restaurant. The man was staring at Frank who was on the verge of crying now. Gerard moved to put himself in between Frank and the man.

"Ain't that Rick's nephew?" The man asked, his eyes lighting up with realization.

"No, this is my brother and he doesn't like strangers. Now if you'll excuse us, we were just leaving." Gerard answered, gripping Frank's arm gently and leading him back into the kitchen. They got weird looks from the kitchen staff, but Gerard didn't care. He led Frank out the back door and into the alley behind the building. He still didn't let go of Frank though, not until they got a good way from the restaurant.

Thy quickly made their way back to the house. Frank had never been so relieved to walk through the door.

"H-He recognized me," Frank said through his sobs. He had started crying as soon as they left the restaurant. "R-Rick will f-find me!" Frank couldn't hold himself up anymore, falling to the floor in his hysterics.

"Hey, no he won't. I won't let him." Gerard said, sitting down on his knees beside Frank. He reached out to rub Frank's back in an attempt to calm the teen. Frank only began to shake his head as he broke down in hysterical sobs. Gerard sighed and ran a hand over his face.

"We can still go to the police and-" Frank cut him off.

"N-No police." He sobbed out, making Gerard sigh again.

"Look, I know you're scared and probably a little embarrassed, but you shouldn't be. You can't let him get away with what he did to you." Frank only shook his head, his eyes squeezed shut tight. "Alright, it's okay, come here." Gerard gently wrapped his arms around Frank who hesitated before leaning into him.

\--------------------

Later that night, Gerard and Frank were in the art room. Gerard was at his desk, working on his newest comic. He was hoping to have a final draft finished that he could send off to publishers. Frank was sitting cross-legged on the couch with the sketchbook that Gerard had given him. He wasn't drawing though. The blank page stared up at him as he stared back. The only thing going through his mind was Rick.

He hadn't stopped thinking about it since he saw one of the men who helped torment him. He never learned the man's name, not that he really cared to know it. In all of his thinking, he decided that he wasn't going back to Rick. If they came to get him, he would kill himself. He wasn't going to live in that hell ever again.

"Do you want to do something else?" Frank jumped at the sudden voice before shaking his head. "Don't worry about it, okay? They... They won't take you. I promise." Gerard wasn't sure he could keep the promise, but je hated that look of fear and sadness on Frank's face.

"Promises mean nothing." Frank whispered, not looking up at the older man. Gerard let out a small sigh as he stared at Frank.

"Frank, I swear I won't let them hurt you again." Frank only nodded a little before finally picking up the pencil and drawing a small design on the page. Gerard watched him for a moment before returning to his own work.

After twenty minutes of Frank doodling, he set the book aside and stood up.

"Going to bed?" Gerard asked, turning to look at Frank who nodded. "Alright, goodnight." He said, only getting a small, forced smile in return. Frank went to his room where O'Malley was curled up on the bed. He walked over and laid down on the bed with him. He wondered if Gerard would keep O'Malley after he was gone? Or if O'Malley would be thrown back out in the cold? He wasn't going back to Rick's, so he couldn't take take the cat with him. Even if he was going back, He wouldn't take his cat to be killed.

Frank really wanted to cut, but knew it was pointless to look for something to use. He was starting to feel aggravated without his blade. He didn't want to live anyway, so why did it matter if he killed himself? He's sure there would be nothing accidental about it. Gerard just didn't understand that.

Gerard also didn't understand that Rick would get his way. He always does. Every time Frank ended up in the hospital with broken bones and they found that He was malnourished, they still sent him back to Rick. Everything about him screamed 'abused child' but nobody cared. Rick always got what he wanted. Frank was sure Rick would kill him if he got him back in his house. He still wanted to end it himself instead of giving Rick the pleasure of doing it.

Frank wrapped his arms around O'Malley and rested his head on the cat's side. He didn't really want to die but at the same time, he did. He wanted to be somewhere safe with people who actually cared for him. But he he knew people like him didn't get happy endings like that. People like him get treated like shit until they die or end their own life. He knew even Gerard would get fed up with him. The only person who truly loved him was his mom, but she was taken from him.

Frank laid there and allowed his mind to replay every horrible thing that happened t him. He didn't want to go through all of that ever again. He knew it was just a matter of time before Gerard ends up just like Rick. It would be better for him to die rather than wait around for the next person who was going to hurt him. 

An hour after Frank heard Gerard go to bed, he quietly got out of bed and went downstairs. He knew Gerard had locked up everything, but he was praying he could find something. Gerard locked up everything.  He didn't leave anything even remotely sharp. Frank opened another cabinet and found it was full of alcohol. He bit his lip before glancing back towards the staircase.

After debating it for a while, Frank pulled out one of the bottles and opened it. He had only been drunk a few times and it was only when he put up too much of a fight for Rick and his friends. They would force Frank to drink until he was completely out of it so he wouldn't fight them. He figured that drinking right here would be too risky. Gerard could come down to get a drink or something and find him. He put the cap back on the bottle in his hand before grabbing another bottle and quietly made his way up to his room.

Once he was in the room, he looked t see what he had grabbed. One was wine and the other was Watermelon vodka. He opened the vodka first and took a drink, making a face as he swallowed. He wasn't a fan of alcohol, but right now he just wanted something to distract him from life. If he couldn't have his razors then he would find something else.

Frank felt weird after finishing the whole bottle. His head felt light and he felt like the world was swaying around him. He began feeling hit and decided to open the window. He got up and stumbled over to the window, the empty bottle still in his hand. He tried not to stumble around but couldn't control his feet. When he was close to the window, he tripped over his own feet and fell to the floor. The hand holding the bottle swung too close to the wall, smacking it into it and shattering it with a loud noise.

Frank couldn't stop the small laugh that escaped his lips. He then got distracted by the shards of glass all over the floor. He tried to get his hand to cooperate with him and grab one of the pieces. About the time he got a hold of one, the bedroom door opened to reveal a sleepy looking Gerard.

"Frank? What happened?" Gerard asked, rushing over, suddenly wide awake. He looked down at the out-of-it teen and the broken glass, catching sight of the label. "Are you drunk?" Gerard was in disbelief. He reached down to take the piece of glass away from the teen whi fussed and reached for it again.

"Come on, let's get you in bed." Gerard said, reaching down to put his hands under Frank's arms.

"No," Frank drawled out, wiggling away from Gerard who had already started lifting him. Frank's wiggling caused Gerard to drop him back on the floor. Frank's hand hit at the edge of the shattered glass pile.

"Shit," Gerard cursed, reaching down to grab Frank's hand. It was scratched up a little, but Gerard could clean it himself. He reached down to grab Frank again, this time picking him up bridal style. The teen fought the best he could in his drunken state, but Gerard managed to hold on to him this time.

"Now stay still," Gerard commanded, hoping the teen would listen. He left the room to grab a rag, peroxide, and what he would need to bandage Frank's hand. He returned to the room to find Frank trying to walk across the room again. "Frank," Gerard sighed, setting the items down on th bed. He walked over and gently wrapped his arms around the other, trying to help him back to the bed. Frank kept pushing at Gerard, trying to make him let go. Frank kept trying to move towards the window.

"Frank, what are you doing?" Gerard asked, his tone becoming irritated.

"It's hot," Frank whined, shoving at Gerard's chest again.

"Okay, I'll turn on the fan, alright? It's ten degrees outside and snowing, you can't open the window." Gerard told him, trying to pull him back to the bed. Frank kept fighting and trying to get away from Gerard's grip.

"Don't wanna lay down," Frank fussed, wiggling around some more and stepping on Gerard's foot.

"Ow! Frank, stop!" Gerard shouted, struggling to keep his grip on the boy.

"No! Don't! Please!" Frank yelled, pushing desperately against Gerard as they got close to the bed. When Gerard got Frank close enough to the bed, he let him go, causing Frank to fall on the bed.

"Frank, we have to clean your hand. I promise I won't hurt you." Gerard said gently, breathing heavily from the fight Frank put up. The teen broke down crying, burying his face into his pillows. Gerard sighed as he got the things he needed to clean Frank's hand. He gently moved Frank to lay on his back. Frank stared up at Gerard with the most heartbroken expression Gerard had ever seen.

"Frank, I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to clean your hand and then you can go to bed, okay?" Gerard explained, opening the peroxide and putting some on the rag. He used it to wipe up the blood before putting peroxide right on the scratches which weren't very deep. Frank laid still while Gerard worked on his hand, his eyes half opened. Frank was waiting for Gerard to climb over him like Rick always did. It never happened though.

After Gerard got Frank's hand bandaged, he helped the teen get under the covers. Frank fought him but with less effort than before.

"Alright, get some sleep." Gerard said, grabbing the bottle of wine before leaving the room to put everything away. He then grabbed the broom and dust pan before returning to Frank's room. The teen was still lying on the bed, staring at the wall and petting the comforter covering him. Gerard used the broom to clean up the bigger pieces of glass before going to throw them away. He came back with a handheld vacuum and began sucking up the tiny pieces of glass. He went over the area multiple times to be sure he got it all cleaned up.

After he was done, he turned to look at Frank who was staring at him.

"I'm not going back to him." Frank slurred out quietly, his eyes glancing around the room.

"I know, Frank," Gerard replied, wishing he could help the teen.

"No, you don't. You say you do, but you don't. I... rather die than go back. I'm gonna die, Gerard." The teen mumbled, reaching up to rub his hands over his face.

"No, you're not," Gerard argued. He wouldn't allow that to happen to Frank. He would do whatever he had to do in order to protect Frank.

"I don't feel good," Frank whined, tears sliding from his eyes. 

"You just drank a whole bottle of vodka, Frank. You won't feel good tomorrow either." Gerard said, not being able to stop the small laugh that escaped his lips. Frank didn't laugh though, instead he leaned over the side of the bed and began throwing up. Gerard closed his eyes and groaned. He should have known that would happen.

"I'm sorry," Frank said before gagging again.

"Please throw up in this if you're gonna puke again, okay?" Gerard held out a small, plastic trash can. He only got a nod from Frank who laid back down, hugging the trash can to his side. Gerard felt like he was going to be sick himself at the thought of cleaning up puke. He then remembered a trick someone posted about online and grabbed O'Malley's litter. He poured some over the puke, holding his breath the entire time. He really hoped it would actually work and not just make a bigger mess.

Gerard stayed in the room with Frank just to be sure he didn't try to get up again. The last thing Gerard wanted was for Frank to fall down the stairs or something. He hadn't even thought to lock up the alcohol he had in the house. After he was sure Frank had either passed out or was sleeping, he got up to get his phone before returning to Frank's room. He Sen a quick text to Ray saying he would need the other's help the next day.

He laid down on the bed with Frank and watched the teen sleep. He didn't look peaceful. Maybe Frank was too much for Gerard to handle. Frank wasn't better off with here because Gerard had no clue how to care for an abused teen who was self destructive. It hurt him to think that Frank would just end up hurt if he continued to stay with Gerard.

Gerard wasn't sure why He had tears in his eyes as he opened his texts again.

**"And I might need you to stay with Frank for a while. I think I need to give him up to the police."** Gerard hesitated before hitting 'send'. Part of him wanted to text Ray again and tell him never mind on the last part, but the reasonable side of him knew it was for the best. Frank needed someone who knew how to take care of him. Someone who could afford to get him the help he obviously needs. Gerard knew he wasn't that person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I feel like this sucked. Sorry if you were disappointed. :\ Also, I've never been drunk, so I don't know how it feels. I really hope I wrote that part okay.


End file.
